Tuesday, December 14, 1999

Ghosts of Christmas Past - 96

[A role playing episode] Harm went in his annual pilgrimage to the Vietnam Memorial wall for his father and met Jenny Lake, a former USO singer, (played by Mac, with her voice altered). Lake told of her experience with Hs father aboard the Ticonderoga back when he was shot down. Mikey played ensign Kyle Everett, PR officer; Rick (from Magnum PI) played Harvey Bambini, their road manager; Big Bud was Jerry Colonna; Teddy was Les brown; Harriet was Phyllis Diller; congresswoman Latham - Dianna Ross; H - Rabb Senior; B - "hoot" Rabb's RIO; SECNAV - Mort Reese, reporter; Brum - CAG (voice dubbed); Gunny - Joe Garcia, intruder pilot; Palmer - "Tong", Badman 2 in Rabb's squad; C - a "slow" southern sailor who gave directions to Jenny Lake; Osborn - an old grateful sailor who said thanks to Lake at the wall; Singer - "JoJo" who put down Tong while he was chatting her up; and, Tiner - Archie, a sailor who chatted up other troop members by lying to them.

Rabb returned from a mission with his plane damaged and had to eject near the ship. The USO troop with Jenny Lake, who recently lost her fiancé to the war, watched as Rabb was rescued. Jenny was despondent, and initially had tension with Rabb; but, he could clearly see that she was hurting so tried to befriend her. He told Lake that being a POW was worse than dying because the family needed closure. And he spoke of "little Harm" back home and his wife. She told him that she really "wanted to have babies with David (her fiance)." Les chastized Lake for "not cheering up the troops" and Tong took a run at Rabb for "taking a run at the singer." They needed reconnaissance in order to fly a later mission so Rabb went as second seat to Garcia to show him where the enemy missile site was located. Returning Garcia was blinded by Reese's flashbulb during the landing and got a wave off. Both "Mikey" and "Harriet" sang at a talent show in the evening.

Lake went to the fantail, despondent over all the things on the ship which reminded her of her dead fiancé. She was just climbing over the rail when Rabb found her and prevented her from jumping. He comforted her and became close rapidly. Rabb was assigned to an "Iron Hand" mission during the USO show the next day. Iron Hand meant to let the enemy SAMs lock onto you so your missles can follow the radar beams back to them- of course trying to avoid being hit by their missles while you're doing it. Lake had given him a scarf in gratitude and "for luck." He, in turn, gave her his wings. Real footage of Bob Hopes Christmas show on the Ticonderoga was interspersed with cut outs of current actors. There was a long closing segment of Lake singing "I'll be home for Christmas" while Rabb flew his mission, was hit and punched out in slow motion. At the wall Lake gave H the wings his father had given her. He took the gift but left them at the wall for his dad.

Tuesday, November 30, 1999

Mishap - 95

Elizabeth "Skates" Hawkes was acting as LSO ("Paddles") when Lt Dalton Jonas crashed into the fantail of the USS Patrick Henry. In investigation Mac (M) thought she was "culpable" and Brumby (Brum)said she was "not". M & Brum prosecute, Capt Ingles decided to hold court-martial and H (H) was assigned to defend her. She told him that Jonas was a "deck spotter" and didn't fly the ball. "He eased the gun on final and made a play for deck - he panicked." She didn’t want to send him around because "he probably couldn't keep it together." However she kept second guessing and blaming herself. H reminded her of when he grabbed her chute and kept her from going into the ocean and told her "I didn't drop you then and I won't drop you now." Jonas said Skates should have given him wave off sooner. Cdr Bates said he ordered her to "send him around again" while he was coming back to the deck. H asked B for his help overheard by Singer (S) who then came into his office and volunteered saying she wanted a chance to impress him. He declined and told her to "next time leave the door open." Hs friend "tuna" came to talk to talk and said that Skates was being "railroaded." He pointed out many accidents due to ship not being combat ready but H would "have to find the evidence on his own." H asked Ingles for ships records and Ingles threw him off the ship after he arrogantly maligned H. Then he preemptively sent a complaint to Chegwidden (C)that H had blackmailed him to drop the case. C told H that he would put the complaint "with all the others."

The XO, Cameron, tried to face down H saying he'd "badly misjudged the caliber of officers on the ship." H replied back "if you think you can intimidate me you've badly misjudged, period… sir." M accused H of turning it into a personal battle with Ingles. He showed they repaired radios by cannibalizing parts, had lost catapult pressure from gun-decking readiness checks, and Leatham testified of misallocation of funds and short staff. M reminded H of when, as acting JAG, he told her not to shift blame or wrestle with two stars. On the stand M tried to get Skates to admit she was thinking about being a RIO and not thinking about landing and the ship. She told the jury that no matter what their verdict she was resigning not wanting "to be a part of an organization who punishes me for carrying out my duties." H gave an eloquent closing saying he was going to blame others but they were just honest, hardworking people doing their jobs the best they could; and said "please don't accept her resignation." Verdict was not guilty and Ingles asked H if he meant what he said in his closing or if it was just a lawyers trick. H said he "always means what he says" then told him that he would be honored to serve under him. Ingles said "I'd like to have you under my command!"

Tuesday, November 23, 1999

Contemptuous Words - 94

[A weakly written episode with blatant computer/internet related errors] A letter was printed in the newspaper critical of President Clinton and claiming to be from a Naval Officer. It said Clinton had "imposed his own bravery-deprived character on the Air Force" citing the air war over Kosovo. It called him "sleazily disgraceful. While getting a golf lesson from Congresswoman Leatham, Harm (H) was told that he had been selected for promotion to commander. Chegwidden (C) then added him to the "posse" trying to catch the officer who was contemptuous of the president.
The talked to the sleazy reporter who needed a civics lesson from Mac (M) that the reason military weren't allowed to speak against the president was to keep the military out of politics- i.e. preventing coups. She let slip that she had only communicated with her "source" through Email! H had Bud (B) trace Emails which tracked back to Hs computer. The Office of Inspector General sent John Nichols, an (all to frequently used) bumbling, arrogant, blindered, investigator with an axe to grind, who spent the whole episode antagonizing, belittling and otherwise railroading H. Leatham introduced H to Daniel Citron of the Roanoke Liberty Foundation (an anti-Clinton organization) who offered legal help. His assistant Suzanne Moore showed H her newsletter which read, partially, "the whackily trendy guidelines" of the educational system. H refused saying he wasn't "ready to BE one of their causes." M asked him "you didn't do it, did you?" then afterwards told him she was a prosecution witness for his joke at Mattoni's party about Clinton's "Whitehouse intern," and "close but no cigar." Because of Brumby's (Brum) smug looks, H suggested that he might have cracked Hs old computer. Brum just smiled, saying if he "didn't find it amusing he might take a poke at him."

While they were watching someone hacked into Bs computer with "Give your friend H my condolences, tough break. Did I put my foot in his mouth?" The OIG wouldn't investigate. H finally took Citron up on offer to help demanding no press releases or public announcements. Moore found message came from Leavenworth and H went to see Palmer, finding him sitting smugly at a computer. He admitted he wrote to "Cheer H up" while the warden insisted his computer had "no link to outside terminals"?!! H found a copy of the article but it had a hidden "digital watermark" from the newspaper showing it had been downloaded- not uploaded. Case went to court-martial and finally H accepted Citron's attorney- Mr. Pappas. Moore tried to convince H that even if he was convicted it "wouldn't be completely terrible." (H acted excruciatingly passive and unanimated through the whole episode). Gunny (G) told H that he supported him "if he did it, but you didn't." Moore sent letter of apology for "sensitivity-deprived" attempts to cheer him up and arranged a meeting with reporters. Before the press conference H confronted Moore with her use of adverbs to modify adjectives in word construction and she admitted she used her laptop to send them. He had to teach her that she used "telecommunication fraud, impersonating a military officer, and conspiring to interfere with administration of justice." He told her "it doesn't matter if I don't like him, he's my Commander in Chief." H was then shown being "sworn in" as commander.

M was pulled into the issue of Laurie Weston, fiancé of marine sergeant Kent Davey, who wanted to harvest his sperm posthumously in order to fulfill his dreams of fathering a child he espoused in letters. After harvesting, Davey's few-days-short-of-divorce wife showed up angry demanding they be destroyed. While M was "hiding" the sperm container in the JAG fridge, Brum quipped "some sort of do-it-yourself kit, right?" M stared him down with H rapidly exiting stating "they want to be alone." Davey's wife got more angry after reading the letters and filed suit. M put the sperm in Harriet's freezer then where "taken into custody" awaiting trial. Weston found she was pregnant so might not need the sperm after all.

Tuesday, November 16, 1999

The Colonel's Wife - 93

A drug bust found a package with the return address on it of Olivia Banning, the wife of the Colonel in charge of drug interdiction in Panama. Harm (H) and Mac (M) were sent undercover to investigate Colonel Bradley Dunston and his wife, the former Olivia Banning, for sending drugs in a diplomatic pouch as cigars. The NCIS agent Grondyke condescendingly assisted them posing as civilian "inspectors." H got photo's of Banning meeting a known drug dealer, Carlos Rojas who was working for the Sauteras "family." Grondyke had a wiretap recording of an affectionate call between Rojas and Banning and them arranging a meeting at night. H had the idea to have Bernado, an informant, tell Dunston of a drug "meeting" at the same time as his wife's "affair" meeting with Rojas to see if he "took bait" and was "dirty" too. Dunston did come alone with either his wife or his marine unit, but was seen arguing and threatening Rojas. Grondyke was ready to arrest them both but M and H pointed out that they hadn't seen anything illegal. They both interviewed Col and Mrs. Dunston at the same time but their stories fit; namely, that he didn't know about his wife's affair or drug dealings and Banning had "unknowingly" mailed cigars for a "favor." Grondyke came with evidence of Banning's secret off-shore bank account containing four payments and $80,000. Then she claimed she had unwittingly opened it as "a favor for Carlos." When even M didn't believe her, she said that she had figured out the mailing and wanted to quit but was blackmailed in order to "protect her husband's work." M didn't believe in Dunston's culpability and pulled rank deciding to use Bernardo to plant the story that Rojas was planning to run off with Banning and the Sauteras' money. Rojas would be too busy running to be able to discredit Dunston or the program. But when Grondyke took Banning to the airport to buy tickets she escaped and went to Rojas' house. M and H arrived to hear gunshots and Banning mortally wounded. They killed Rojas in a gunfight and M saved H from being shot. They told Dunston that Banning had been there "to call off their affair and that she had said she loved him."

Ron Katz, a very wealthy former roommate of Bud's (B) came to visit and started B obsessing over "missed opportunities." They had apparently been co-nerds and had races dis- and re- mantling PS2. Katz, founder of Wahwahpedal.com an online searchable database for music, had asked B to be his partner. B, too fearful, declined. Tiner said he had bought 100 shares the day the stock opened and it had recently had gone up $18 a share. B found that Brumby had been a professional boxer at age 17. He had seen stars during a fight and joined the Navy instead of going to a major fight he was booked in. He said he wondered "what might have been" every day. Gunny told B of a girl who had asked him to the Jr. Prom in high school. He didn't take her because he didn't have transportation or clothes etc. She married a dentist and had children but whispered to him recently at a reunion, "you should have called." Chegwidden (C) told B that Tiner had been asked by his brother, owner of a topless bar, to be his day manager. And, C said, he had worked during high school summers on a ranch in Wyoming, so he "could'a been a cowboy, yee haw." Katz and his snotty, prissy wife finally had lunch together and his wife sowed disgust at a child who would "cry." B realized that he wouldn't have traded his family for success with Katz.

Tuesday, November 9, 1999

Rogue - 92

Bud (B) was assigned as the JAG liaison to ex-SEAL Jack Raglan who conducts "mock" terrorist activities on naval facilities in order to test security. General Otis Flannick arrogantly ignored Raglan's breaking into and blowing up his base until Raglan added "believability" by adding public humiliation and "capturing" his wife from her shower. B hoped that would end his assignment but Chegwidden (C) told him that he was the most junior so he had to do it. B told Harm (H) that he didn't think the sentries, with live ammunition, knew it was a game so H went to talk with Raglan. During a manly hug Raglan stole Hs wallet- to teach him a lesson about security but H had already taken out his ID cards and lifted Raglan's walled as well. He said "fake left, go right" and reminded him of their football days together. Admiral Tom Kly told Raglan that his program was ended but gave him one last mission: "to sink a submarine." Instead, Raglan stole the San Pedro which was loaded with 60-mile range missiles. C took H with him to investigate and left Mac (M) in charge and to tell Harriet (Ht) at her own discretion. H told Kly that Raglan had done it "to prove you made a mistake in pulling the plug" and it would be in a "big and out-in-the-open way." Raglan had B, who injured his knee during the take over, read a prepared statement asking for $100 million or they would blow up a civilian target. The frigate USS Ellyson went to intercept the San Pedro so H joined it because he knew Raglan best. The skipper Cdr Wallace Burke [Malicious, know-it-all, who court-martialed the SECNAVs son in a previous episode] started with bullying and abusing H. Raglan hid below a thermocline then fired a water slug to confuse Burke and get away. B tried to signal but was tied up until he promised to behave.

H told Burke that Raglan would go west down the coast and Burke said East. A sensor was tripped east so Burke chased and ordered "sub bombs'' dropped over Hs vehement objections [baiting him as he had done the SECNAVs son]. They turned out to be low energy charges to Hs relief and said it was "payback" for Hs cross-examination which had embarrassed him. Raglan radioed "you blew up a decoy, you return to base." Kly and C discussed philosophical issues about evacuating New York and that it had become personal. Finally Kly offered to consider it a "misinterpretation of orders" if Raglan would give up. Raglan gave the order to blow up the Statue of Liberty then let B think that he had swayed one of the crew by letting him use the radio to "tattle" to H about the target. This gave Raglan time enough to leave the ship. Burke was enthused about "killing" the sub and had ordered to "fire" just as it surfaced and gave up. H figured out that Raglan wasn't on board and surmised that he was going after Kly's wife just as he had done with gen Flannick. H was ready to intercept him. Kly was going to court-martial Raglan but H intervened saying it was a legal minefield having been deceived and defeated by a security exercise he had authorized himself. C asked him if he really wanted the public to know he had been ready to blow up a $600 million sub. Kly relented.

Ht, who had gone home to be with little AJ upset that B was in danger, came back and hugged him. H said "don't I get a hug, I helped" and B replied "just as soon as I'm done with my wife."

Tuesday, November 2, 1999

Psychic Warrior - 91

Lieutenant McGrane, the subject of a "remote viewing" experiment had "flashbacks" and killed himself by escaping the room and jumping off a balcony. Admiral Harrison Spencer, the director of the "Star Gazer" research program for the navy was then blamed for the death by Admiral Linsenmeyer, director of naval intelligence, who was trying to make his embarrassing program go-away. McGrane had lied in order to join the experiment and Spencer had initiated his "viewing" experience before the drug screen had returned. McGrane was using psychotropic drugs "Sertraline and Fluoxetrine" for "manic-depression and anxiety." Arrogant Linsenmeyer commanded Harm (H) and Mac (M) to "work it out with the minimum embarrassment to the navy," and H had to put him in his place saying his sole allegiance was to exonerate Spencer. M badgered H about paranormal belief and predicting the super bowl. Spencer wanted to take the stand and use the trial to publicize his research despite Hs disagreement. M badgered him into claiming he could bend spoons and trying on the stand. He failed and blamed it on the "environment" of the courtroom. Bud (B) was helping M with prosecution but began badgering professor Pilkinton, his own know-it-all skeptic witness who was maligning anyone who believed in paranormal activities in general. M had to tell him to "sit down and be quiet." On cross examination, H showed him up for the arrogant bigot he was.

Chloe called M from her grandparents house and asked if she was dating H yet. She said she had a dream where they married and she was the flower girl. Later she fell off her horse during a ride and went missing. M was worried and Spencer offered to "remote view" in order to find her. M told him unequivocally no but then while M was cross examining him went into a trance and said he saw Chloe under a covered bridge, over a dry stream, by some white rocks. Spencer was found not guilty of involuntary manslaughter but guilty of disobeying an order (using McGrane before tox screen back). M flew back to Chloe's grandparents house and, while on the plane, had a "vision" of lightening striking a tree in the forest and Chloe appearing from behind it. When riding in the truck with her grandmother they were stopped by a tree across the road. M recognized it from her vision and began searching the area. Chloe was found wet and whining. When M came back to JAG she said that she was recommending the court accept "mitigating" evidence and retirement with no loss of rank or benefits. Spencer looked at her surprised by her turn-around and declared that she had seen a vision. When M admitted she had to H, he asked her who was going to win the super bowl.

Tuesday, October 19, 1999

Front and Center - 90

Harm (H) received his second distinguished flying cross in a conference room ceremony and Chegwidden (C) had Mac (M) do the "honors" and kiss him to Brumby's (Brum) annoyance. H and Bud (B) were assigned to prosecute Marine private William Clawson who attempted to rape a city councilman's daughter at knife point until Cpl Keely Woods prevented it. Woods was stabbed in the fight. Colonel Hegsterrer advised that Woods was "uncomfortable with the limelight" and even refused to attend ceremonies to receive the Navy Marine Corps medal. After H and B talked to him, Woods went UA then they had to track him down. They found that the information given on enlistment papers were false. When Mattoni, defense, found out they had no witness he offered to "settle for 6 months confinement." Clawson flippantly said "I was just messing with her," H told him he was the "luckiest sailor in the navy" and to not be the "stupidest." B showed photos around the DC playgrounds and a boy named "Toops" ID'd him as Lamar Dunwoody who had killed his brother. H found Dunwoody's mother who said she hadn't seen him. Toop's gang started harassing his mother so Woods/Dunwoody came to find H. H backed him down saying that he really wanted to do what was right and took him to a basketball court where they played trying to "think it over." Woods admitted he was in the witness protection program for turning in a gang member who had killed a man at an ATM for $40. H bet his testifying against leaving him alone on a final shot. H fouled him and when Woods came at him in anger, H backed him down again about not acting like a gang member. He was shown missing his shot then testifying. Later he said goodbye to his mother still in his uniform.

Brum was still blatantly "on the make" for M. She bristled and denied it when H told her that Brum was "on her scent" telling him that he'd been gone 6 months and he was not on a "need to know basis" for her relationships. Brum came again to her apartment unannounced with food. She accepted but when he tried to kiss her she said "she wasn't ready yet." Later H apologized to her saying he should have believed her because "there was not chemistry between them." Brum volunteered to prosecute PO Richard Brendisi when M was assigned to defend him on possession of marijuana charges. M motioned for dismissal of charges because no field test had been done by the agent and all lab specimen's were mysteriously lost. The arrogant and capricious judge Sebring told M he "wasn't letting her out the back door." The agent testified he "knew it was marijuana" by the look and feel- "real good stuff" he said. His dog, Jingo, was old with cataracts and M wanted to "examine the witness." Brendisi said that the packet was Tropical Oregano that he was bringing back for his mothers restaurant. Jingo picked an oregano bag in court so Brendisi was acquitted. Later M found that Jingo had been decommissioned and she felt guilty so she "adopted" him.

Tuesday, October 12, 1999

The Return - 89

[Harm is back at JAG, but has lost the "fight for his client with the same tenacity he had as a naval aviator" as promised in the intro. The episode is about an emotionally abused child coping with continued abuse as an adult officer. And how easily, and insidiously, military justice can be perverted] Harm (H) returned to JAG he said it felt like he "had left yesterday and been gone 100 years." People didn't know him and he missed most of the office "inside" joking around. Chegwidden (C)feigned being offended when H expected to do "scut work" like Mac (M) was forced to do after she left then returned. "Do you think I would be so petty?" he asked as he assigned him a "good case" with a smirk- the SECNAVs son. Brumby (Brum) was in Hs old office and began baiting and pressing fights with H from the beginning. Lt. Brian Nelson was being court martialed for standing up to his arrogant vindictive CO Cdr Wallace Burke who was treating him like his father had done all his life. After a mistake at the helm, quickly corrected by Nelson, Seaman Rivera was unjustly and summarily sentenced to bread and water on the bridge. When Nelson pointed out lack of due process and refused to escort Rivera to the brig Burke relieved him of duties for court-martial. The SECNAV spoke with H and said "for the good of the Navy' it couldn't go to trial. He said he and Brian were alienated, having expected perfection from him during childhood to the point of taking him off his baseball team for not getting straight As. H got Burke to agree to drop charges if Nelson would "publicly admit he was wrong and apologize." Nelson said he had been subjected to verbal abuse, constant fault finding, rebukes in front of the crew and wouldn't accept the plea bargain. Brum maligned H in front of C for not making Nelson apologize to which H responded "as usual Cdr Brum has hit the nail squarely on his thumb." When Bud (B) asked why, Nelson said "why does any tyrant abuse his power- because he can!" B observed that his own father had also made him "feel like a looser." Gunny (G) found no official complaints about Burke but plenty of people who said he was "a hard ass" choosing one Jr. officer each cruise and "makes their life a living hell" until they break. When B began his standard defense to show that the order wasn't lawful Judge Sebring protected Burke with his rulings to the point of being similarly tyrannical to H. H told B to "back off" on their defense prompting M to ask him what was going on and say that she could advise C to have him removed from the case. The SECNAV came to Hs apartment and said that he had met Burke and told him to "see what his son had in him" and offered to testify. H didn't take that either and instead recalled Burke. H finally recalled Burke and while listing the points that showed lack of due process and judge Sebring stopped him. H was able to trip Burke into admitting he "intentionally provoked Nelson into disobeying your order for the sole purpose of punishing him later- making the order unlawful"; but, members found him guilty anyway. In the hallway Burke wanted an apology to reverse the charges but Nelson said "I would have made a good officer." Nelson told H "so he wins," and H responded "No, you loose."

H was told that Admiral Nash had nominated him for a second distinguished flying cross for pushing the F14 by its tail hook. M tried to begin socializing with H but he had other things to do. He called Jordan but she didn't return his calls until she came over and revealed she had orders for Spain. She said "maybe when I get back from Spain." C told him to change his uniform from that "line officer star" into the JAG Mill Rinde.

Tuesday, October 5, 1999

True Callings - 88

[Episode based on the Mar 10th, 1967 incident where USAF Capt Robert Pardo used his F4 Phantom to push a fellow aviator from North Vietnam into friendly territory.] Gunny Victor Galindez (G) arrived at JAG with everyone but Tiner and Bud's (B) blessings. Chegwidden (C) said he was having trouble obtaining two Limp Bizket tickets for a charity auction and G said he might be able to obtain them. Both B and Tiner decided to "one-up" G and get the tickets themselves. C enjoyed the competition. Tiner and B bid against each other on EBay until B won at $200. B kept telling G he couldn't sit at different desks until G said he'd sit on the floor thereby shaming him into letting him sit at Harriet's desk. Mac (M) told B that "Tiner was a child but you're not." G obtained the tickets "comp" from a roady friend- B got a donation receipt. M seemed very subdued; especially when C didn't acknowledge her efforts getting G to come to JAG.

Harm was flying missions aboard the Patrick Henry with Skates as his RIO. PO Sean Curran smuggled an endangered pregnant woman, Zepa Berisha, aboard his COD flight and onto the ship. She was pregnant through Serbian rape and in danger of death by her enraged fiancé. Lt Aldridge, the JAG, had never tried a criminal case but decided to start on this one. He adamantly refused Hs offers of help and botched badly until the last minute when he was loosing to the equally inept Lt Yuen. After the closing statements H came back from flying and showed that Yuen had charged Curran with non-applicable statutes. H was assigned to recon missions behind enemy lines. Skates developed panic attacks over the danger. H had a talk with her and revealed a week of feelings of impending death- "back in the days when I still thought that they would name an airfield after me." He said that he only knew "if you keep flying it does go away." Hs wingman was hit by flack which destroyed one engine and they were going down. H wouldn't let him eject in enemy territory when "feet wet" was so close. Tuna told him to "leave and let them eject in peace" but H had them lower their landing hook then pushed them with their hook on his canopy. He told Skates to keep them above 500 feet going over a ridge but gave her the call. She overcame her fear and let them get to 350 feet but they succeeded until they were "clear for nylon descent." Skates said if she "could get through flying with H she could get through anything." The pilots told H he was too young to be called "pappy" and gave him the new call sign of "Hammer" like his dad. Capt Pike had several "fatherly" talks with H and advised him that he had "nothing further to prove" and that he'd "miss him." H "had no career" flying because he'd "missed a couple of wars" and "those numbnuts will get a command before you do."

Tuesday, September 28, 1999

Rules of Engagement - 87

[Continued from previous episode]The SECNAV (yet again) slammed on Chegwidden (C)demanding rushed prosecution of Lt Andy Buxton to appease the Russian sensibility over death of their peacekeepers. He was even more incensed to learn that Harm (H) was on the ship. Mac (M) and Bud (B) were assigned to investigate and, after their welcoming hug, H was surprised to see that M had been promoted. He snapped to attention and became very military. He said he was not JAG anymore so wouldn't help her investigation. Buxton complained to H that it "just felt right" to attack the vehicles driving down the road toward some civilians. He said they were just in the wrong place when I was in the right place. The SECNAV forced a manslaughter charge and Buxton claimed he had spoken with H as a lawyer so he couldn't be a witness. C also sent Brumby (Brum) to "second" Hs defense. B continually reveried a shipboard pilots wonderful life and miserated over being a "legal weenie." The JAG, Aldridge, testified that Buxton had disregarded the rules of engagement and had ridiculed them when they were explained by asking if he needed to "ask the president when he had to scratch his six." Brum argued with H about everything the whole case. Then during the cross examination of the CAG, Capt Pike, Brum took over and tried to blame the CAG for not recognizing incompetence, but Buxton stopped him. The Russian admiral, "liaison" was angry and demanding throughout the trial. H finally took the offensive and explained that: Russian and hostiles flags were almost identical ; the vehicle shot at was the same as used by hostiles to kill civilians; and standing orders were to protect civilians. M pointed to the ROE authorizing "fire only after fired upon" and get "permission" before engaging. H got him acquitted but then recommended reassignment. The CAG sent Buxton TAD to Capodichino as corrosion control officer pending a FNAEB to yank his flight status. H said he would testify against Buxton telling him "you're a menace to yourself and us."

B revealed to M that he and Harriet hadn't been amorous since AJ was born. M called Ht and "fixed it." Harriet called B and "talked dirty," to make him feel better; and B was annoyed when H tried to distract him with offers to fly in an F14 and "even shoot the guns" and told him to "go away."

Tuesday, September 21, 1999

King of the Greenie Board - 86

[DJEs contract renewed and he is now on a carrier flying F14s as "Pappy"] Harm (H) is on the carrier Patrick Henry flying F14s with Skates as his RIO. He suffered a bird strike and was streaming fuel so needed an emergency refueling. Lt. Andrew Buxton, (known as X-man) although almost empty himself, broke off from the tanker so H could refuel and said he "had plenty" despite suggestion that they both wait for the next tanker. H did a single engine, hard, landing on the 3 wire and Buxton hooked the 1 wire after an engine flame out. H had 6 straight "green" landings and was catching Buxton on the "greenie board" a running summary of their landings. Buxton reveled that he was the "king" of the "greenie board" and referred to himself in the 3rd person as "the X-man." Captain Pike, the CAG, chewed Buxton out for not waiting for more fuel. A real fleet JAG "weenie," Lt. Aldridge, briefed the pilots on the rules of engagement in real "gobbledegook" language such that Buxton asked "and if we have to scratch our 6 do we have to phone the president?" After Aldridge left, the CAG said that if a MIG is on your 6 and locks you WILL see a missile come off its rails. CAG tried to bring H in the middle of it but he kept a true lawyers skillful, non-committal answer. Buxton challenged Hs allegiance and H said "were the good guys Buxton, we didn't get that way by firing first." CAG had H take over as division leader from Buxton. Buxton brought up charges on his plane captain (Griggs) when a new Infrared Pod came off on take off. H asked to investigate by CAG. Griggs said that the new device was "a Murphy" and would go on either frontward or backwards. Several people, including Buxton himself, hadn't done a thorough pre-flight check so H recommended that Griggs not be charged. Buxton flew off the handle and said he wouldn’t have him back so H said he'd take him and advised "he's too good to be yours." Before their next mission they watched as Admiral Takushkin came aboard as a Russian observer. They were also told that there was a "spy plane" with a radio-controlled, gyro-stabilized telescope in a Lear jet watching them. Buxton went after a "lone" MIG despite being told he was beyond bounds and to disengage and H warning that they always flew in pairs. When the second MIG got a lock on Buxton from behind H had to engage a lock on it. Despite Buxton's urgings for H to fire he waited and the MIG disengaged. Again, the CAG chewed Buxton saying "you can't be all plumbing and no forehead." H, perfunctorily took blame, and CAG told him to "teach Buxton something." H told the arrogant Buxton that he "confused reality with his score on the greenie board." Pissed off Buxton he maligned H to his RIO as jealous and said he'd prove he was better "the next time I'm up." They were assigned to photo recon of mass grave sites and H went to take care of the spy plane while Buxton went to get photos. Hs warnings went unheeded so he flew in front of the Lear and did a fuel dump on it. Buxton saw a vehicle heading down the road toward some civilians and, despite warnings, strafed it. When they arrived back on board CAG charged him with killing Russian peacekeepers.

Mac (M)was promoted to Lt Col and had a "private" wetting down. Harriet (Ht) brought little AJ into JAG in his sailor suit. Tiner was driving Chegwidden (C) crazy with his ineptitude in office procedures. M was prosecuting Corporal Winrow, against Brumby, (Brum) for misfiring a "Brimstone 2000" anti-tank weapon and starting a fire. He had gone out and gotten drunk the night before. Brum was still, relentlessly, pursuing M socially and bet her dinner on the outcome of the case. Brum was loosing until M called her own witness, Gunnery Sergeant Victor Galindez (G), who was accepting a job with the guns manufacturer. On the stand, and to her surprise, he disclosed that the weapon had a faulty guidance system when it got over 90 degrees. He had gotten into the companies files at night to research the problem. Winrow was acquitted and M had a talk with the G, being impressed by his pursuit of truth despite personal convenience. She talked him into applying with C to run the JAG office. When C commented on Gs prior boxing during his interview, he commented that he held h is own- especially against SEALS! C told him that he knew one SEAL he'd have trouble with and stared at him down his nose in a stand off. He told G that there were navy people in the office he'd have to deal with and G replied "if I'm the gunny they will have to deal with me." He was hired.

Tuesday, May 25, 1999

Goodbyes - 85

[This was the seasons cliffhanger as DJE's next year contract not settled.] Charlie Lynch was back and came after Dar-Lin. He killed his old Master Chief, who had gotten him discharged, then a motel owner and Dar-Lin's aunt. He told a bar maid that he was trying to settle some scores and start over again. Harm (H) told Mac (M) that he wanted to see what he had missed by loosing his sight. He said he wanted to start with a clean slate and she observed that "you have anything BUT a clean slate." Lynch impersonated a step-brother, trying to get information from the social worker; but, she was on to him and reported him to NCIS. However, a loose lipped policeman told him everything he wanted to know including Hs name. Before H could move Dar-lin to another safe-house, Lynch got some stationary from the SECNAV and got entry to the base. He shot the sentry and foster mother then kidnapped Dar-Lin. He took her to his old decommissioned ship where H confronted him before agent Holland and backup arrived. Charlie attacked him with an axe so H shot him. Jordan helped Dar-lin but was distant to H.

Baby AJ was christened with H and M as godparents. M said she wanted a "great career, a good man and lots of comfortable shoes." Chegwidden (C) tried several times to talk H out of leaving; but, obtained authorization from SECNAV and orders to Pensacola for him, which he offered to cancel. C told M that he wouldn't take H back if he decided to come back. H said goodbye to everyone. B hugged him uncomfortably, Brum was scoping out his office and M embraced him, weeping, saying that she had "so much she wanted to say but didn't have the words," and "why am I the only one crying." H backed out door with his one box of things and saw everyone watching: M was played out; C disappointed; Tiner and Ht stoic; B raised eyebrows in "good luck"; and, Brum just nodded "yes."

Tuesday, May 18, 1999

Yeah Baby - 84

[An Important episode in JAG history. Harm leaves JAG and they make the "5-year baby promise."] Harm (H) had a dream of his night carrier crash that killed his RIO. Mac (M) had a dream of kissing Brumby (Brum) in an elevator. Jordan came to cook H breakfast and saw his letter of request for change of designator and transfer, which upset her. Harriet (Ht) was grousing at Bud (B) for grimacing when she insisted on talking about "breast pumps" in the middle of JAG. H gave (C) his request. Initially C was pleasant but as H ignored his logic about "backward stepping" he became more agitated and dismissed him. Jordan came to Hs apartment to confront him and said "I've never been dumped for an airplane." She said she fell in love with a lawyer and not a fighter pilot and stormed out saying "call me when you've made up your mind." Chloe was staying with M and talked about her father and M getting married so she could have a mother again. After Jordan left H went to talk to M and she was first upset that he hadn't told her about having surgery and then said "you can't do that" about leaving JAG. After H left Brum came unannounced and M told him "it was a bad time." C talked to the SECNAV about changing Hs designator. The SECNAV said they didn't retrain people past their prime, it was career suicide and he'd "been a thorn in his side since he first heard his name." C said "well it's HIS career," and the SECNAV said he hated to help but it would get him the #$% out of Washington." C told harm that he spoke with the SECNAV, that it was the "stupidest thing he ever seen him do," and he was replacing him with Brum.

Chloe's father Kyle came to take her away to her to grandparents leaving M alone. M talked to C in the kitchen and when C asked if he could help she said "no, you're one of them." When C asked "which one" M said "both of them." Brum persistently pursued M and compared her to his mother while they were stuck in a intermittently broken elevator. B defended lance corporal Edward Carr who's Staff Sergeant, Aileen Morris, had seduced him then distanced him to keep it secret. B asked the pregnant Morris on the stand directly if she had seduced Carr and she wouldn't answer because she had gone into labor. Imes complained that he had badgered her client into labor. Morris had no one to take her to the hospital and Carr volunteered. She admitted that it was his child. Ht also went into abnormal labor and was taken to Cs office. B got himself locked in the elevator, H said he "didn't want to do it again," and Brum offered but was sent packing after admitting he'd only delivered sheep. Tiner's grandmother was a midwife so tried but fainted when he saw the baby crowning. Bs client took Ht's ambulance so amidst confusion C delivered the baby in his office. M told H that just as she put her life together "everyone always leaves and pulls it apart." H missed the reference to himself but said that "if neither of them are in a relationship 5 years from this moment we will go halves on a baby." "don't make promises you can't keep," she warned. "I haven't yet," he said and they shook on it.

Tuesday, May 11, 1999

Soul Searching - 83

Harm's (H) Corvette was stolen and he got hung up in the telephone menus to the police when trying to report it. Brumby (Brum)flippantly told H that it probably had been chopped up so just let it go. Mac (M) finally helped him report it to a detective friend of hers who didn't hold much hope either. Harriet (Ht)drug Bud (B) to car lots in order to buy a minivan for their upcoming baby. She succumbed to a hot shot salesman and wanted a van with all the bells and whistles which cost more than B made in a year.

Webb froze and didn't fire when his mentor Tim Fawkes was kidnapped in Italy by Teresa Marcello of the Red Brigade. She was "freelancing" for the Serbs in order to work a "trade" but the "company" wouldn't even acknowledge Fawkes. W attempted a rescue, without "company" authorization, which failed, to the hurt of Italian police who were helping him, because they seemed to be warned beforehand. W came to request Chegwidden (C) for his help knowing that Fawkes had saved Cs life in Vietnam. C said "he saved my soul." They needed Enrico Amati, a mafia don, to tell them were Fawkes was being held. It turned out that C had killed Amati's nephew while rescuing his daughter Francesca. C acknowledged that Amati needed to fulfill his obligation to his families vendetta but got Amati to delay notifying his sister for 24 hours. They obtained some satellite surveillance time and found that Marcello was moving Fawkes and kept looking up to the sky. They realized that the terrorist had been told they were being photographed by George Decker (CIA station chief) who was in charge of the CIA's "non-response." Actually he had been paying some money each month as "option" until he could get the million dollars authorized that they wanted. C coerced him into helping them "pretend" to pay ransom. C told W that many years previously he had been assigned to take out a person who was using drugs to interrogate captive US soldiers and obtain intelligence. Fawkes had been the "spotter" who was to call his shot using a baseball analogy code. Fawkes realized the person was a nun and didn't call the shot so C didn't need to shoot her. They decided to use the same analogy to rescue Fawkes. Decker was wired so his conversation could be heard by W and C stationed around the money drop point. When Fawkes called the shots they took the two terrorists out before they could detonate the radio controlled explosive vest they made Fawkes wear for the money transfer.

While C was gone, H was acting JAG and attended the budget hearings. He and B decided to put the money needed to repair the courtroom ceiling and roof from the bullet holes he made, into the building health budget. The police found only the frame of Hs Vet in a chop shop after the rest had been stripped and sold. M, who was with him, retrieved Hs gear shift knob for him to put in his new car. He decided to get an off-road vehicle, emotionally unable to replace his vet. Ht forced B to accept her fathers money to buy the minivan and M bought a red vet, much to Hs dismay.

Tuesday, May 4, 1999

Wilderness of Mirrors - 82

Chegwidden (C)was going to argue a case before the supreme court having to do with a sailor who developed aids, thereby earning his "silver quill pen." He decided to hold a Moot court on a Saturday in order to prepare and asked everyone to come be judges. Harm (H) had planed to go sailing with Jordan but didn't say anything about it so Mac (M)spoke up for him. C gave M, Bud (B) and Brumby (Brum) robes for the occasion and made B "chief justice." The SECNAV came to try and get C to let a "justice weenie" argue the case. C told accused him of not trusting him and said that arguing before the supreme court for a lawyer was like planting the flag on Sarabachi and he not only was capable but intended to win. B agreed with one of Cs arguments one time and was roundly chastised and told to be "aggressive." B was shown making several very technical points and eventually got so carried away that he became belligerent and abusive to C, telling him to sit down. M jumped in and extended the time so C could make his argument and was able to "win" his point. However, M came to Cs house after she was relieved from watch to inform him that the sailor in question had resigned his commission thereby canceling the case. C couldn't be comforted and told her that "the other side retreated, there's no satisfaction in that!" When B apologized for his belligerence C told him that he could be a great lawyer, to just let his style develop naturally and not to fire any weapons in the courtroom.

H began seeing his father. First at JAG then at his apartment. He got phone calls with his fathers voice. Jordan was staying at his apartment for the weekend and was interrupted by a patient who was seeing his dead partner and feeling guilty over missing a shot. Because H was having his own "visions" he went to talk to M instead of Jordan telling her that she had always humored his occasional metaphysical moments. M told him that he should be speaking to Jordan so he did with his anticipated results. She immediately jumped to hallucinations and wanted to do a CT scan to rule organic brain disease. He eventually realized that the phone calls were exactly what his father had said in his letter tapes, and found that his tapes were out of order so someone had been in his apartment. Of course he thought of Clark Palmer, and was correct. H traced a phone call back to a hotel where a Harmon Rabb Sr was registered. H said he could be the hunted or hunter so, over Jordan's objections, went to confront Palmer. It was a ruse, however, in order to get Jordan alone so Palmer could take her hostage. He gagged and bound her to a chair and placed her behind a Mylar mirror angled so H would see Palmer sitting in a chair from the door. When H returned Palmer had the lights off and flashed lights into Hs eyes while he talked to him. H pulled his gun while they argued and finally Palmer pulled his gun to force H to fire. Jordan tapped the mirror with her foot but H realized the image of Palmer was drawing his gun with the reverse hand so he fired to the side of the mirror. Jordan capitulated that H wasn't unstable and didn't need therapy. H accompanied Palmer to Leavenworth so he made it to jail this time. Palmer faked a trip and was shown picking up a paper clip and secreting it in his sling.

Tuesday, April 27, 1999

Second Sight - 81

[Lots happening in this episode. Joseph MacKenzie, Mac's estranged father and Deanne, her mother, are introduced. Harm has surgery to restore his night vision.] Father Genaro, a priest in a hospice center called to notified Mac (M) that her father, Joseph MacKenzie, was in a hospice dying and wanted her to be there. Harm (H) gave her an eloquent talk about obtaining "closure." He asked "why is it that we think it's a good thing to bury things, pretend they don't matter." She got upset when he told her that much of her life, Marine Corps, alcoholism, and relationships with men, had been influenced by her father. He said unless she got closure "every time a man got close you'll push them away." She arrived just after her father went into a coma and was so upset she retched as she re-lived abusive situations as a child. She pounded on her father saying he couldn't die then attacked a soda pop machine. Genaro tried to break through Ms defenses. She said she was offended by his "wimpy-ness, naiveté, your sanctimony, your presumptions and your thinking you can walk into the middle of a family and heal all wounds." There are scars there, she said, and "what's left of my soul is covered with them." Genaro had a sappy grin and she warned him "don’t turn the other cheek, it just makes me want to smack it." Genaro argued back that he agreed he was a wimp, but he used naiveté to get what he wanted and he preferred the term "sanctified." He told her that her father "hated your boyfriends because they had your respect," then when she ran away went into a downward spiral drinking more. "Abandonment was a recurring theme of his life," he told her. Ms mother arrived, she said to see M not her ex-husband. She had abandoned the family when M was 15 and at a sleep over. Joe came home drunk, held a paring knife to her throat, drew blood and threatened to cut her into little pieces. She got on a bus until it stopped. She tried to call for a month but Joe always picked up the phone then later didn't because she was afraid M would be angry and reject her. Genaro pressured M to go in while he was dying and gave her his wallet to see. It had clippings of all Ms accomplishments that he had followed, proud that she was able to rise above his failure as a father." Her mother refused to go in with M and her father, still in a coma, squeezed her hand just as he died. Genaro quoted a Buddhist verse and said not to tell the monsignor. Her mother told M that "he got to you didn't he?" M, crying, asked to be held then remembered that it was her father who had held her, crying, as a child. She said "he was a confused, miserable drunk but made a home for me in his own pathetic way" which meant more than her mother coming back to see her. Her mother got self-depreciatory and M told her to "stop it" then knelt in front of her and said "I forgive you."

Chegwidden (C) and Bud (B) were trying to do a video-conference call to a ship. Tiner, trying to make it happen, by-passed a faulty fuse that he learned from stealing power in college. He said it wouldn't last long and it eventually blew out the power in the whole building. H nearly crashed in his Stearman during a dusk landing and decided to have an exam from another ophthalmologist. He was told that the original diagnosis was incorrect and that he had retinal scaring from a bout of toxoplasmosis which could probably be corrected. He asked C for time off to have surgery and C asked if it had career implications. H assured him the decision had nothing to do with his feelings about JAG. The surgery went well but H was anxious over the results. He told the doctor that he had destroyed a $55 million aircraft and his RIO was killed. The surgery was probably a "fools errand" if he thought he would ever be let back flying. The doc told him that "no one can fault you for trying to complete your dream." He showed that the surgery had worked by catching Harriet in a dark stairwell when she fell down the stairs.

Tuesday, April 13, 1999

The Adversaries - 80

Harm (H) swore in Bud (B) as Lieutenant and his father Big Bud (BB) appeared unexpectedly, in uniform. He had been ordered back to duty to stand court-martial for stealing VCRs and Televisions from the Navy while he was chief of stores on his base. An owner of Dobie Electronics, Glen Dobie, was caught with stolen electronics having altered serial numbers. He was given immunity when he offered to give them BBs name. All records had disappeared mysteriously. He asked B to defend him and laid it on thick to Chegwidden (C) about being proud of B and wanting to get closer to his kids. C allowed B to defend him and said "God help you both." Dobie said that BB had inspected machines, erroneously claiming that they were faulty. He gave the old machines to Dobie and ordered new. When the new came Dobie switched serial numbers and gave the old machines back to BB, keeping and selling the new machines with the old serial numbers. BB met Dobie in the hall and slugged him. B had to drag him off and told BB that he would defend him as a lawyer and NOT his son. He was to call him sir from now on and not son or Bud. H prosecuted and offered to accept a plea until midnight. BB had to give B a pep talk because H had said that there were no holds barred and was psyching him out. BB told B to use Hs strengths against him- let him think he is better and then "Pow." Mikey (Mk) returned from boot camp all stiff and military, looking for his dad. He said that he was switching to combat ops (radar) instead of the art program that B had spent so long getting him in to. H found 27 units that had altered serial numbers and B had doubts that his dad was innocent so he talked to Mac (M). She said that H "wasn't invincible" and that she would help him. Harriet (Ht) talked with M and said that B didn't have an aggressive bone in his whole body while B was shown ripping into Dobie on the stand calling him a parasite. H offered to drop the larceny charges for 1 year confinement. B turned it down and Mk said "is this where H pulls a rabbit out of his hat." BB forced himself to Bs wetting down party at McMurphys and drunk, started to pick a fight with H. C physically took him away and home. C told H not to underestimate B- "remember who his teachers were." H talked to a sailor who worked for BB who said that she had seen a civilian come by who BB agitatedly hustled away. He was in a "Dopey electronics" van. H got Dobie to tell him the name of the driver of the van- Jerry Kemp; but, he said that only BB knew where he was. H pressured B to help find Kemp and was chastised by M. H said "he can handle it," and M retorted "but can he handle being hurt by a friend." B did get Kemp and H treated him as a "hostile witness" leading him into testifying damning evidence against BB. On cross examination B got Kemp to believe that he was his father. He had Korsakoff's Syndrome and no short term memory. He agreed with H because "he looked honest and figured he must know." The case was dropped and H congratulated him for a "brilliant diversionary tactic." later H confronted BB with selecting B as defense so he could appeal claiming inadequate defense. "He was willing to damage his son's career to get himself off." All BB said was "are you going to tell him?"

Jordie had volunteered to be psychiatrist for Dar Lin, the abused girl. Coulter called H to check on Dar Lin and before hanging up told H to "call her sometime when he didn't want something." Ht apologized to H for hitting him when she saw photos of Dar Lin's twin. H told her that "if everyone resigned who wanted to hit me we would loose half the Navy." NCIS found a match on fingerprints for Charlie Lynch and Dar Lin identified him from photos. He was dishonorably discharged 6 months previously. Jordan and Imes teased M about her relationship with H. M said that "nothing happened" but they didn't believe her. Jordan said that sometimes she thought she and harm "would go on forever" and other times "just until you decide you want him." M told her that "I am not a threat to you Jordan."

Tuesday, March 30, 1999

Shakedown - 79

[Chegwidden's "adopted" son is introduced and found to have leukemia.] The USS Coral Sea was experiencing chronic severe power interruptions while in the middle of flight operations in the no-fly zone. A steam pipe failure with severe injuries brought Harm (H) and Mac (M) to investigate. A civilian contractor, Yarborrough, told them that the ship had failures for some time, including lock-outs, system crashes, and false alarms. He was described by the crew as a "smart guy who likes to remind you of it." they met another civilian contractor, John Newman, when examining the failed pipe and found acid had been applied. H had to rush M to the wash down station when her gloves began burning from the acid. H went to the bridge during a "rumble" and everyone watched him as he "armchair quarterbacked" the downing of two Iraqi MIGs. M observed to H that "you were good weren't you?" He responded that "I still am, and status current." M felt the need to pontificate at him about "never being able to go back, because you're too important to JAG." He told her it "wasn't my choice." Newman told M that the acid was a spontaneous metal dissolver (SMD) used as "liquid torch" when flames were inappropriate. M saw H watching flight tapes and walked away. He caught up with her and she said she was beginning to worry again with him trading one obsession for another: "finding your father, Roscoe, now the little girl and what's next, flying?" He told her that she was just afraid "you'll loose me." She merely responded "maybe, or that you will loose yourself."

Yarborrough spilled coffee on the XO so he could be alone with the computer to install a clandestine computer program which caused power failures. H told the captain of either Saboteur or Vandalism then asked Bud (B) to check the names including civilian contractors. The steam injured sailor told H that Newman had been in the engine room before the break. H bet dinner for a week that the guilty person was Newman. M bet it was Yarborrough because he was a "disgruntled, former-navy geek who tried to prove himself smarter than everyone else by creating problems then fixing them." But only if the dinners were restaurant not home cooked cause if they served "Harms meatless meatloaf on the ship they would have to take it off the ship in the hazardous waste." Yarborrough patched his laptop into a computer link splice in the bulkhead which produced multiple outages, alarms and failures. He and Newman went to the disbursing office when the captain shut off unnecessary power and stole over a million dollars. While they were climbing up a ladder, Newman kicked Yarborrough into the sea. When the theft was reported H & M realized that it was just a diversion. M found the patch in Yarborrough's room. When she pulled the plug all the lights and systems (magically) returned to full use and two "bingo" Tomcats were able to land. H confronted Newman (alone!) in Hazmat and a fight ensued breaking gooey material all over and starting a fire. Newman ripped off Hs mask which ticked him off so he knocked Newman out and drug him to the wash down station. H flummoxed the captain, when he asked how he had figured it out, by saying that it was because of "Harm's meatless meatloaf." M suggested that H stay aboard for a few days, and that saving a million dollars would probably be worth a ride in a Tomcat. H got his ride.

B was sworn into the bar and got his insignia. His first case was defending someone who relieved himself in public. When B complained that he was going to defend "the Urinator," H told him that he could always "pee-bargain" and M said "there were no small cases only small bladders." B found a Urologist to testify that his client had "prostatitis." Commander Coulter called H to check on Dar-lin. H said she was in foster care awaiting adoption and he checked on her two times a week. Coulter told H to "call me sometime when you don't need something." He said that he would. Lt. Sherkston (sharky) was introduced as Chegwidden's (C) "son he never had." A few years back, when he stole Cs car, C offered to not press charges if Sherkston would join the Navy. He became a seal and C became his "mentor." He was in Washington for a medical checkup at his wife, Shelly's, insistence for a "bug he had since returning from the gulf." It was found to be leukemia and Shelly had to come to C for help because Sharkey was refusing treatment. She said it was because Sharkey was afraid of being weak in front of C. Sharkey told C that he had seen the treatments NOT work on his father when he was eight. Just took away his fathers dignity and will to fight. C then turned to "tough love" by saying he would make a few calls and have him out within the hour. He held up the nurse call button and told him "just ring the bell. Be like all those whining, bawling mamma's boys who dropped out of SEAL training. Donuts and hot coffee for all pukes who wanna quit." He told Sharkey that this was the "battle of your life. If you don't have the guts to see it through then you will loose and you will die so- ring the bell." Sharkey didn't, and they both had a "hoo-yah" fest.

Tuesday, March 2, 1999

Nobody's Child - 78

An unknown girl was beaten to death on naval property being turned over to DC. Although not a student she stowed away on a school bus touring the base but sneaked away and was chased down by a naval Master Chief. Chegwidden (C)assigned Harm (H) and Mac (M) to see to it that the ball wasn't dropped. Agent Holland was investigating for NCIS and they found a Master Chief insignia in the girls hand. While there H seemed contemplative and saw the girl in sort of a vision. He sent M on back and he stayed with the body while the autopsy was performed. He asked C to be assigned to the case and was allowed. Eventually he brought in Doctor Coulter to perform another, more thorough, autopsy and she found that the child had died from severe abuse including being locked away and needing to eat paper to survive. No one reported a child missing and H and Coulter held a burial service and read from the bible. M could tell that H had the "same look in his eye" as when he was chasing his father and defending the "king of fleas" but H kept shutting her out. Bud (B) found records of a convicted child abuser living in the area with his brother who was a master chief. He and H tailed the man, William Hawkins, and harassed him until he told them where he had seen the child and that he had worried she was being abused but was afraid to report that he knew. H took a drawing around to the neighborhood and found a woman who would tell him where she had seen the girl if H would track down her deadbeat navy husband. The girl lived with her aunt Marjorie Lewis who had moved out with "Charlie" one week prior, in a hurry without notice. She said that the girl never spoke and didn't even say thanks when she had been given one of her husbands insignias. A social worker told H and Coulter that the girls name was Annie Lewis and her mother had died 3 years previously. She had been given to her maternal grandmother to raise, but she had died 6 months previously and Annie had been lost to the records. She said she couldn't legally give H the address but left the chart out where he could see it. They went to the abandoned house and had "feelings" that the child had been there then found the closet where she had been locked. H saw the girl, that he had seen twice in vision, and followed her to a hiding place. She was the dead girls twin sister, Dar Lin. She said that "they grabbed Annie but I got away" and Charlie had locked them in the closet. He had told them that he would stomp their head if they weren't good. H promised her he would find Charlie and make him pay. Then he was shown making the same promise to a headstone engraved with Annie's name.

C gave B the newspaper to read that he had passed the Bar exam. Ht was helping with the case and clumsily dropped the folder of photographs onto the floor. She freaked out when she saw then and chastised H for taking the case when he didn't have to and getting B involved. She slugged H then came to C the next day resigning her commission. He tried to downplay the incident but she said she "struck an officer." He said that all he had seen was her making an exaggerated gesture which by chance struck H. He tore up her resignation and muttered "I can't count the number of times I thought about hitting Rabb."

Tuesday, February 23, 1999

Silent Service - 77

The submarine Watertown surfaced in middle of norwegian sailboats and Chegwidden (C) sent Harm (H) and Mac (M) to investigate while they were having significant disagreements. Commander Flagler gave M XO Eustis' Palm Pilot to use while aboard. Mess Chief Basilio said that the boat was "not right," having more injuries and illnesses than he'd seen in 7 years. An entire watch got EColi dysentery, ruptured eardrum and scabies requiring sterilization of the entire mess. He said the corpsman was the "hardest working squid on the boat." Chief Hodge, corpsman, said the crew had 4 back-to-back patrols without liberty and had "shared stress." He pressed on Ms foot to "cure" her sore neck. The boat was ordered to N Korea to find an underwater missle facility so they were stuck for 14 days and had to "hot bunk" in the enlisted barracks. The enlisted thought it was funny to harass M with the trash compactor until she faced them down and promised to "haul them out the forward trunk and feed their #!@ to the crabs." H tried to settle her about the "pranks" but finally suggested they "just try to get along." He said he would be more sensitive and she less. She said if he was more sensitive she wouldn’t need to be less. A seaman was killed by a ruptureing high pressure valve which lacerated his Vena Cava. It was probably due to a tiny nick in the packing of the valve during maintenance. Flager didn't accept the XOs suggestion for burial at sea and ordered the food cooked and the ice cream eaten so they could use it for a morgue. At dinner M brought up a "cursed boat" and was shot down by Flagler. Hodge announced that seaman Bluestein had "hepatitis A" so everyone had to be tested. H deduced that someone was trying to hurt people because the crew hadn't been ashore in four patrols to contract hepatitis A. He and M thought it might be the XO due to his lack of empathy for the crew and being the only one on the watch that didn't get sick. He told H that he was the only one who was allergic to wheat and didn't eat the pancakes. Flagler was angry that they woke him up with their accusations and no back-up.

M told H that if they pursued it they would "be the most unpopular suests at the party." H said "as long as we dance together" and M retorted "and you lead." They got into another row that their anger wasn't just "a bump in the road." H said you "honestly resent me" and M said "and you have no faith in me." She suggested they talk about it and H said "this isn't a marriage" so she walked away. H asked Bud (B) to check the records of all the crew and he asked what it was like on a submarine. H told him he could find out by "throwing away all his fresh fruit and vegetables, putting lube oil in his humidifier, sleeping on a shelf in the closet and going to work before sunrise." C came on the line and asked him if he was operating with the full consent of the skipper or had done anything irregular, unlawful or ill advised. B called back that the crew were outstanding and mentioned that Hodge had received commendations two times before for outbreaks of Legionnaire's disease and serious bacterial infection- three epidemics in a row! H went to the infirmary and found an empty bottle of ipecac (emetic) so confronted Hodge with his Munchausen By Proxy syndrome. He had called M down to the infirmary but Hodge struck him in the throat causing spasm then injected him with sedation. When M came H couldn't speak. She told Hodge to accompany her to the bridge to inform the CO. H got to the computer and emailed Ms PDA that it was Hodge. Hodge put ammonia in Ms eyes but she kicked him to the ground and ran into the infirmary. She and H hid in the bulkheads but Hodge came in and tried to inject H again. He dropped the syringe when H hit him but had the advantage and slammed H around. M turned on steam jets; but, when H was downed, was choked into unconsciousness by Hodge. H stuck him in the back with the syringe to subdue him and rescue M.

H was still hoarse when they left the ship. Flager was down on himself for hand picking Hodge and M gave him encourgagement. He told her that "healthy self-criticism was useful but we should never underestimate our support." He said "you two are quite a team. Do you always work this well together?" M told him "when he lets me do the talking."

Tuesday, February 16, 1999

River's Run - 76

A teenager, Brian Yarrow, was shot and killed in a national forest where a SEAL team was conducting exercises. Lt Rivers received gunfire and returned fire only to find the dead boy. Chegwidden (C) sent Harm (H) and Mac (M) to investigate. FBI special agent Al Grenin, who previously and maliciously charged H for murdering a Russian mafia agent, said the FBI was tracking a federal building bombing fugitive in the area. Warren Toobin, who's bomb had killed a man, had become a local "folk hero" for the areas' separatists. They left food and supplies for him. Rivers told H & M that his team was only traversing through the forest to get to their normal exercise area and he had been shot at. When he heard that no gun was found he went UA to track who had shot and caused him to kill the boy. C gave H & M 24 hours to bring him in before filing. Having lunch in a small café, H revealed to M that he had washed dishes in the "Eagle and Key café in Julian California" during a high school summer break. Rivers found Toobin's hide-out and began tracking him. He was bit by a copperhead snake and was captured by the separatist gang. Harriet obsessed about the "dead little boy" and Bud (B) had to stop her. She was given her lieutenant JG bars by C and she said she had "completely forgot her two years were up" (yea right!). Grenin climbed on C for sending H & M into the area claiming they would "screw up his investigation."

A local red-neck thug, ex-sailor Lewis Beecham, started harassing M in the café and when H stood to back him down his gang had to be stopped by Mr. Yarrow. Yarrow said his son Brian didn't have a gun and that the "corrupt government had subverted our liberty and undermined the law of the people." He told them to leave but H put a tracking device on his truck which led them to the compound where they were holding a kangaroo "peoples" court for Rivers. M went to higher ground to try and call out on their cell phone while H went in to the compound and was allowed to "defend" Rivers. Yarrow's daughter testified that Brian had his gun in the forest and that her father had gotten it back the next day. Warren Toobin testified that Brian had brought supplies then saw soldiers coming and assumed they were after Toobin. He shot at Rivers, just to scare him, and allow time for Toobin to escape, but was shot. Toobin took the gun, gathered the casing and hid "while the soldiers went by." None of Rivers' men were there and when he tried to say so the judge gagged him. Yarrow quoted the Declaration of Independence and spouted rhetoric about his opinions of the government. H pointed out that the founding fathers said the established government shouldn't be abolished for light and trivial reasons so they gave the Constitution so that it wouldn't be. The separatists ignore the Constitution. Rivers only had returned fire, just like any of them would do. Brian had died because of the hate and suspicion his father had planted in his heart. C assigned B to see if the Forest Service was pressured to close the normal insertion area so the SEAL's would need to use the alternative near Toobin. Lewis' gang on the jury found Rivers guilty without deliberation and the judge sentenced him to be hanged just as a helicopter flew over. They put H, M & Rivers in a shed while Toobin escaped out a tunnel and the rest got their guns in a standoff. H realized that the autopsy had shown Brian was shot in the back exonerating Rivers. They surmised Grenan had done it and told Yarrow; but, he wouldn’t believe. C came into the compound and promised "someone would pay" to no avail so Rivers stood out to let Yarrow shoot him. Yarrow's daughter stopped him saying "she didn't want to loose him too." As Rivers limped out he told C that a Copperhead had bit him. C said "I hope you bit him back." [The producers felt the need for epilogue titles saying that Rivers had been exonerated and was back instructing SEALS, Grenan had been temporarily suspended and faced possible manslaughter charges, and Toobin was still at large. To my knowledge none of those plot lines were ever followed up.]

Tuesday, February 9, 1999

Webb of Lies - 75

Webb (W)called Harm (H) from a ship, where he was under fire; but, H was kissing Jordie so he couldn't be bothered answering. By the time H picked up the reciever, the phone went dead. The next day Chegwidden (C) was notified that Ws burned body was found on a freighter and he assigned Mac (M) and H to find out who did it. CIA agent Paul Candella broke into Hs apartment saying he was investigating Ws one minute call the night before. Bud (B) found that a Japanese scientist, Shoei Wakita, was one of the bodies found with W and he had been working on a superconductor. When Wakita found out that the Bradenhurst corporation was the one funding the research, he disappeared with the prototype. When H heard the words "Bradenhurst," he immediately went to Leavenworth to interrogate Clark Palmer, but found an imposter serving his sentence. H knew the murders on the freighter weren't performed by Palmer- they were too messy. Worried about H, M stayed with him overnight; but, she couldn't sleep so field stripped Hs pistol. M told H tearfully that "everyone around her keeps dying:" W, her ex-husband, and Dalton. H got the DUI charges against Jordie dismissed and she brought him copies of the autopsies. All three had been killed with similar weapons but W was also burned so had to be identified by dental records.

C told them that the CIA suspected a mole inside it who kept funneling information to ex-DSD agents (competing with them as "intelligence beltway bandits.") Palmer bluffed his way into CIA headquarters to obtain records on the superconductor and was nearly intercepted by Candella. H & B went to "feed Ws fish" and found that he had been a musician competed in the 1988 Olympics' modern pentathlon. Candella interrupted them and seemed surprised when H told him that Palmer wasn't in Leavenworth. Palmer was waiting in the backseat of Candella's car and they spoke, knowingly, about the superconductor. Candella said Palmer would get it when they found it. Palmer gave him a cigarette, laced with high tech poison, which killed him. H visited Ws mother who said that she and her husband, Neville, were both intelligence agents and Clayton had gone "into the family business." His mother took a call from Lt Abby Cowan, who didn't exist in military databases. M discovered that the name was an anagram for "Clayton Webb." H found W alive on the ship with the superconductor. W said that he had believed Candella was the mole so couldn't tell anyone in the CIA that he had arranged to get the scientist and the superconductor into the US. Palmer trailed H to the ship and got the drop on them. He had arranged a "trap" for Jordan at Hs apartment in order to bargain for the superconductor. W was already shot in the leg so, when they escaped from Palmer, H sent W off the ship to get help for Jordie. Palmer, however, shot H and got the drop, again, on W who he forced to retrieve the superconductor. Just as he was going to shoot W, H appeared and shot Palmer three times while chasing him onto the deck. He went back for W and when they returned found Palmers body gone. H found Jordie asleep in his apartment but Palmer had left a photo of himself taped to the back of the door.

W said that Palmers ultimate revenge would be to leave H in the "wilderness of mirrors"- a term for extreme paranoia suffered by "spooks" in the business too long. Bud was third in law class. He angered Harriet by wanting to wait for M to read his grades to him, like she always did, for luck.

Wednesday, January 13, 1999

War Stories - 74

Chegwidden C assigned Mac (M) and Bud (B) to defend Commander Thomas Risnicki, leader of SEAL team 8, charged with involuntary manslaughter and disobeying orders. He had delayed his assigned rescue mission for 2.5 hours due to adiabatic fog which probably would have killed the team then found the three NATO hostages hung. They were killed by an ultra radical faction of the Yugoslav army who had given NATO a day to leave the country. When the team arrived 37 minutes late the observers were dead and the SECNAV told C "you could hear NATO Commander, Major General Richard Plesac's screams all the way to the White House." C appointed Harm (H) to act as JAG during his "forced" use of vacation time. Brum asked H about defending a tuba player who struck a "flatulent note" as the president sat down, and Harriet (Ht) asked about naming their son. When H suggested naming after naval hero's they all commented that H seemed "different," "older," and "getting taller." With Plesac on the stand M brought out his previous reprimand for "ignoring intel, being ambushed, and the 14 men who died were not worth another bar on his shoulder." Plesac shouted at M then went to the SECNAV who demanded to see H. M said she was going to call Plesac again because he had a "history of loosing men under fire" and wanted to "contrast his apparent disregard for lives with Risnicki's concern." When H disagreed with Ms need to "shift blame" onto Plesac in order to win the case, M told him that when he "got power he became as political as the SECNAV."

Unable to find anything to do, C kept calling H and told him to "call or stop by anytime." He finally drove to JAG headquarters only to find Fran Glass producing a movie, "Field of Gold" starring Dan Lander, being shot in front. After dressing down an actor, thinking he was a disgraceful soldier, Glass convinced him to work as "technical advisor" for the show. When H came that night to talk he found C with the co-star as a date. H said that M had not taken his advice and C reminded him of all the times he had ignored the advice C had given. C said that he had to "decide what was best for the case: defending your authority or the choices of the people who define it." Then advised that H "get a handkerchief." The SECNAV ranted and raved in Hs face about maligning Plesac and said that "if M called him again he would make him personally responsible for the fall out." H told M that it would be her call. Risnicki found that B hadn't taken the bar and threatened to dismiss him. H told Risnicki that his "best shot was to use his strongest ally" so he didn't fire him. B found that the bodies were already cold and stiff so that they must have been killed at least a day before. Risnicki's delay had kept them from falling into a trap. He was found Not Guilty of manslaughter but guilty of disobeying an order. Risnicki apologized to B; and, when told he didn't need to advised B to "accept any and all acts of contrition because you don't often see it." C was fired from the movie because he dressed down the director for rudeness. When he returned he had become used to all the snacks on the set so told Ht to see that JAG got some. They asked if they could name their baby after C and he said he was honored. They all were happy until C revealed that he expected them to name him "Albert Jethro Roberts."

Tuesday, January 12, 1999

Dungaree Justice - 73

[A follow-up to the episode where Mac confessed to killing her estranged ex-con husband] Mattoni prosecuted Mac (M) for "lying" in the court-martial of her and her ex-CO, John Farrow, over the death of Christopher Ragle her estranged, (but not divorced) ex-con, husband. Harm (H) defended her arguing that it wasn't to avoid punishment or germane to the case because they were wrongly charged so it didn't rise to the level of perjury. Adm Morris agreed and sent her to Captains mast before Chegwidden (C) who wasn't very happy. He chewed her out for not only lying but for not trusting him and making him think she had murdered her husband. He said he was withdrawing his recommendation for her early promotion to Lt Col. and would dismiss her from JAG if she ever lied again.

Mikey (Mk) had been coerced into joining the navy by his father and came to Bud (B) to ask him to get him out of it. Tiner helped B find possible excuses behind Cs back. C told them that he hadn't "seen someone look so guilty since his last visit to the white house." B couldn't find a "loophole" and advised that he would have to "suck it up." Mk said B was just like dad and hope he "did a better job raising his son than dad on us." Later he came back and apologized saying he was a great brother and the baby was lucky to have him as a father. B took him to the navy art gallery at Annapolis and said that after boot camp he would try and help him get into the navy combat art program.

The owner of a bar, Peter Reardon, was beat up by 3 sailors who said they were doing it for "the Hawk." Reardon identified PO3 Wade Colbert, (actual beater), seaman Hendrix and seaman Olin. M and H investigated and found that the three denied knowing anything about either the beating or "the Hawk." They asked questions of the ships captain about non-cooperation in what they were calling "unit cohesiveness." He got angry at them but while on the bridge they overheard a radio transmission referencing "the Hawk," PO Lopez, a female gunner. She claimed not to know anything either, and denied being in the bar that night. They recommended referral to an article 32 hearing and were assigned to prosecute while Brumby (Brum) defended. C told them to identify, up to the top, if there was a culture aboard the ship that condones dungaree justice. They found that Lopez had missed role call two weeks previously after getting drunk with her three buddies at Reardon's bar. While she was in the restroom the three left in bar, drunk, and when they didn't return Reardon gave her coffee then helped her to her car to sleep it off when she couldn't find her keys. M and H interrogated her about her lying by omission and, after H left, she told M that she was just trying to "fit in" by not complaining. M told her that she could recognize the signs of someone who is trying to forget a drunken indiscretion. On the stand H got her to admit that she had passed out in the car then awoke finding she had been raped and drove home after finding her keys on the floor of the car. She had missed muster then told Colbert about it. H went to Reardon with accusations but he (luckily?) had been wounded in Vietnam and was impotent so couldn't have done it. Brum let H talk to the three and advised them they had beaten the wrong man.

Hendrix and Olin got civilian lawyers and turned evidence against Colbert for immunity against prosecution. On the stand Hendrix said that they had taken Lopez' keys for "survival training" and that it was Colbert who had the idea to beat Reardon up and actually did it. H got Olin to say that Colbert had taken her keys but had given them to him. H charged that it was he who had gone back and raped Lopez but the keys fell out of his pocket onto the floor. H told him that he had immunity from the assault charges not rape. He denied it on the stand but when Lopez asked him "why did you do it?" in the hall he told her that "military wasn't a woman's game." He said he "didn't join up to have some girl calling my gunnery," in front of M and H. At episodes end H saw C watching a ZNN report about the kidnapping of 3 NATO observers in Kosovo. There was a 24 hour deadline for NATO withdrawal. C said almost all at the Pentagon "were looking pretty grim;" and when H asked who wasn't looking grim, replied "some of my old friends."