Unknown Soldier - 225

Cr's brother Wallace (former Vietnam SEAL traumatized & disaffected from Vietnam service) asked Cr to investigate the found remains of soldier he believed was Marine helicopter pilot Lt Joe Johnson. Cr gave V 5 days to interview and "see the jazz festival." Gr also assigned and had to "coerce" V into "doing his job" as he wanted to slack off all the time. Drove to Joe's hometown Vicksburg while V was asleep in car; newspaperman said Joe's bro Elroy (DNA for ID) was blues guitarist & knew Loretta McKeely in Tutwiler; Loretta said he divorced her for some "Jezebel" (her sister April-Dawn); who said he divorced her for "Candy Graham" another singer & gave them a home made record. V forced himself on Gr in same motel room; sleeping in same bed though Gr said it was against regs. She guessed that he had been "left at alter by only woman he had ever loved" which upset V. Gr recognized "Candy's" Voice as Indira Diamond. Drove back to Natchez where she was appearing. Indira said Elroy left; got wedding invite from PO box in Memphis, might find him on Beal St. Tried all clubs on Beal St, found Etta (Gladys Knight) & guitarist told them Elroy had died. After leaving, V realized that guitarist had same guitar as in photo of Elroy. Went back & guitarist was Elroy. Wallace disclosed details that helicopter had gone down after chasing Vietcong away from their POW rescue black-ops mission. Co-Pilot & gunner thrown clear, Joe trapped inside. Wallace couldn't budge aircraft. Joe begged him to "not let him burn" asking him to shoot him until he finally did before flames got him. Wallace got peace; Elroy gave DNA but said he didn't want to know results so he can "keep thinking that he might run into him some day.

Mattie still in coma; H prosecuting reservist doctor Lt Chang for using "Vecuronium," muscle paralytic, to intubate a severely burned Iraqi girl against orders from Capt Smith. When H was speaking disparagingly about Chang, Co told him that she was an excellent doctor who didn't give up, "the kind that he wanted for Mattie." H seemed distant toward M who told Co that H wouldn't talk to her so maybe he would w/ Co. Smith said that they "ran out of drug" and helicopter had to risk enemy fire to bring more. Chang described that she couldn't "not use the drug" cause she was "a doctor first" and she knew that it would work. Got the child intubated; left to take blood to lab and 10 min later girl dead. H very distressed during her description of valiant attempts to save girl but in cross exam played attorney very well and pointed that she "had never considered herself in military despite joining to have her medical school paid for." B discovered that Smith had made the mistake and only ordered 1/10th of needed drug which made them in short supply and required military shuttle replenishment. H agreed for administrative separation & prorated payback but Chang turned it down. She said she had been successful at everything because she had worked at it but had never really applied herself to being an officer. Military needs doctors more than ever now; wanted to accept consequences and remain in service to finish her commitment.

Two Towns - 224

[This episode was skillfully written to compare incidents in two towns: Kresge OK and Talasura Iraq; and two people undergoing trials. It is actually the same plot in two different settings with differently named characters; and, is quite good considering H and M are in "parallel play," again.] Lance Cpl Scott Van Arsdale and two of his buddies saw Ma'Mun Al-Reza hurry distractedly out of the platoon mess tent just before a bomb exploded. Scott stopped to tie his shoe so was the only one of 17 reservists from Kresge not killed. Harm and Bud were sent to Kresge to help process survivor benefits, so happened to be in the story line to investigate the fire bombing of the Reserve Center. The whole town turned out to see Scott's homecoming. Mayor Hazlet, an attorney turned real estate agent, said that all of the boys had worked on their parents farms and had joined the reserves together in support of their country and families. They were combat engineers and none complained when they were called up. Within minutes of the center burning the sheriff caught Scott nearby, smelling like gas, and guiltily, preemptively saying you've got the wrong man. H heard that Scott had a "strong moral center" but had refused to talk to his pastor. Cliff Pardee, the military rejected brother of Scott's dead friend said that Scott was a "goody, goody" who "even picked up litter on the way to school." They heard nothing that exonerated Scott so they recommended article 32. The town, however, blockaded his removal to Washington saying "we've given up enough of our boys, you're going to have to fight for this one." They decided to hold the hearing in Kresge with H & B prosecuting. Hazlet decided to defend for free over Hs advice. Hazlet threw suspicion on Cliff who had an anger issue, punched a wall, siphoned gas from sisters car, had no witness for where he was during fire and had lied to H about why he was rejected from the service. After being rebuffed by Cliff H befriended his son, Donovan, who was carrying a cat that had lived in the recruiting station as a mascot. He said that he had been given the cat for safe keeping by Scott just before the fire set. With the new evidence he confessed, waived his article 32 rights and accepted punishment. He said that he was just so angry he didn't know what else he could do but that he was sorry he had deceived them. One by one, all of the town stood in his support.

Meanwhile Ma'Mun was being held under duress by Colonel Mazzone, trying to extract a confession. Cresswell sent Mac to the area because Mazzone wanted someone "who could relate" with the mother of Ma'Mun who was making a huge fuss. Ma'Mun had actually been working as spy FOR the US, against the village Sheikh who was a town tyrant, known terrorist and had been killed resisting apprehension. Ma'Mun's backpack was the explosive device but he claimed he had nothing in it except a few personal items including a Koran. He had left the tent realizing he had left his pass in the bathroom and going back to get it. You could tell M was not happy with Ma' Mun being tied to a chair for hours but participated in Mazzone's "plan." She visited his mother and said that as a prisoner of war and would continue to be regardless of her attempts to shout down elected officials, enlist al Jazeera or write threatening letters to US congressmen. "It must be working, you're here," she said. M replied that she had no authorization to change his status but if she would lower her tone "we could have a reasonable discussion." She then told M a very convincing story about being trained as an interpreter in Baghdad but fleeing with her son after the Shiite rebellion where all males between 18 and 60 were killed by SadDAM. Ma'Mun had convinced her to return last month, as safer and an opportunity to free the community. He had a vision where "boys like these could be educated." M said she couldn't see her son but asked for a letter. Then she told Ma'Mun she had seen his mother- but refused further information; and had a letter- that he couldn't see. Finally he signed a confession. M had to demand to tell the mother herself over Mazzone's objections. When she was told, Mrs. Al Reza asked "under what conditions," to which M didn't answer. She showed M Nabil, an orphan, delinquent boy, who she had chastised for throwing rocks. He had accused her of just being mad because the Sheik killed her son. He said he had been on a balcony and overheard the sheik talking to another man about putting a bomb in Ma'Mun's backpack. M found wire, semtex and defaced Koran pages in a boarded up shop. Mazzone bad-mouthed Ms evidence and request for stake out. She finally convinced him with simple investigative logic, confession extracted under duress, and why did you ask for someone who could relate unless you wanted me to "relate." They eventually did catch Mohammed Sadar, on the "hot list," coming back for his stuff, and got a confession from him.

The people in Kresge voted to donate 25% of son's life insurance policies for a war memorial to their son's. Ma'Mun was released and M had Mazzone go to a town meeting where a school was announced with Ma'Mun as the teacher. Mazzone would answer questions "about the occupation and how it will affect our lives." When everyone clamored to ask a question he murmured to M "What is this?" She told him, "Democracy, sir."

The Four Percent Solution - 206

[A substantial and significant episode- Cdr. McCool's words are in italics.] Christmas eve Mac (M) was driving in the rain, and was distracted by her personal feelings, triggered by a radio program, causing her to toal her car. During the ambulance ride, she had "flashbacks within flashbacks" back to the previous two months. She had gone to see Lt. Cdr. V. McCool for sleeping pills, due to having insomnia. M was flippant and evasive. McCool was judgmental, challenging and held the prescription over Ms head in order to extract information. M finally told her that W (W) had faked his own death, deceived her, had no sense of what he put her through and did it with his mother's help! Dalton had been stalking her, and had been shot by a cop who was also stalking her. She was saved by Harm (H) but not before being captured and held. She revealed that she had been leaving the lights off at night in her apartment. "Not having to look at choices you've made." She said that she discusses things with H "endlessly." She had lived with Brumby, who then left; but, hadn't lived with W. She initially refused to talk about having children; but, then confessed she had had diagnostic surgery - advanced endometriosis - that left her with less than a 5% chance of possible conception. She regretted waiting too long. Right guy didn't appear? "I Wasn't looking." She said she was involved with H, "in ways you can't imagine. We've been dancing around a relationship for 8 yrs" What's keeping you apart? "Me... him. We made a 5 year deal for having baby." A backup plan. A set up for failure? She had told H about her endometriosis because the 5 years are up. H had told her that: "it didn't change things. There is IVF, surrogacy, donor eggs. HOW doesn't matter, only that it happens between US. I'm tired of looking in on your life, I want to be a part of it." M said: "I can't do it" - because she thought he had an agenda - namely: the loss of Mattie.

Why didn't you allow yourself a chance to consider it? "It is too close to Ws death". H hadn't shown emotion at Ws death, but told her: "I've been concentrating on what you were feeling - I'm going to miss the way YOU looked when you talked about him - No pressure, lets just look into possibilities." M said "He gave me space… (not what I wanted)." M went to H during crises in her other relationships. Will he ever abandon you? "No" Isn't He the one you’ve always intended to be with? Why do you always choose to be alone? That made M cry. "I've always wanted to CARRY a child," she said, "raising one is not enough." Harriet had told her that pregnancy felt like "Collaborating with God." "I've never created anything," M said. M had seen H with Alicia Montez (the attorney from a previous episode) the previous night. "H has moved on." "If I could have the conversation with W again I would ask different questions… but, I will never see him again." "My chances of drawing closer to H are less than 5%." Well, McCool said: I'm offering a 4% return on your personal investment, a satisfying conclusion to former relationships, a bright outlook on a future one, a shot at having a family… that’s better odds than a T-Bill! M didn't get the sleeping pills she was requesting.

H came to the ED because M had been repeating his name to the ambulance attendant. He gave up his usual X-mas eve trip to "the wall" (Vietnam memorial for his father) to stay with M instead. She told him "I've been pushing you away… I’m sorry." H said "nothing's changed, I'm still here. Enjoy the miracle, you're alive." M replied "The best thing about that news is that we both are."

One Big Boat - 212

[The series has clearly changed direction. Inane, fluffy, "Soapbox drama" issues, with contrived conflict, now outweigh good plot and action in nearly every episode.]Unannounced, Mattie (Mt) had Harm (H) sign her custody relinquishment papers; then, proceeded to whine the whole show that H had done it. She needed to talk to Mac (M) about "why H didn't make a fuss!" M told her that H was "at a place in his life that he didn't need to posses someone to love them." H had to qualify in F-18s and wasn't there for the custody relinquishment hearing. When he returned, he accidentally caught Mt packed and leaving. He gave her a note to open later, but she opened it in the elevator anyway. It contained Hs wings and a note stating "fair winds and following seas."

Creswell (Cr) continually acted condescendingly critical of M (and everyone for that matter). He is curt, short (in every way), arrogant and critical whenever anyone doesn't act precisely like he thinks they should - HIS image of a "good marine." He finally, cryptically, ordered M to have breakfast alone with him. Her feedback to him, about his appearing judgmental, was simply shrugged off claiming "you've been around Navy too much and they have rubbed off on you." (?) He basically "ordered" her to have it "wear off," and told her: "Consider that a vote of confidence- and trust that others trust you." [That must be his way of giving closure.]

M prosecuted Cdr. Lunt, an Annapolis sailing instructor, for dereliction of duty and negligent homicide when Seaman Emma Green was lost overboard in a storm which "they should have gone around," (according to her military disliking parents.) Mikey (Mk) , also on the ship, challenged everyone who seemed against Lunt, including his friend Dupree. Bud (B) had to reign Mk in, forcefully, and accused him of raising Lunt to the level of "father figure." Seaman Huskins, who fell overboard first, also testified against Lunt saying, retrospectively, "it was too hard for me" - despite the fact that she had actually voted to go through the storm with the rest of the team. Turner (T) defended Lunt and deduced that the excuse-ridden Huskins had untethered herself from the safety line in order to check below deck; but, then had negligently left the hatch open. She re-tethered, so that, when she fell overboard, it put the entire crew into rescue mode. During the rescue, Green had seen that the hatch had been left open, and then had to untether in order to go close it. She had slammed her fingers in the hatch door when she closed it, and then was washed overboard before she could reattach to her tether. T quoted G K Chesterton "we are all in the same boat on a stormy sea and we owe each other a terrible loyalty." Lunt was acquitted but claimed he was retiring.

Hail and Farewell (Part I) - 205

[Season finale (a real downer!).] An attempt to rescue three men in a Zodiac life raft, during a severe storm, failed. Three of the men attempting the rescue, drowned as well. Chegwidden (C) sent Turner (T) to the Thomas Lyons to investigate, where he was stonewalled by the captain claiming to have a "classified" mission. T found little information, but when he went to fax his report back to Chegwidden, the communications officer said he would have to "check" the names in T's report against those on the "list" which were not to be released. Looking over his shoulder, T saw that Webb (W) was one of the classified three, who had been drowned. W had told M (M) that he was going to Germany, and promised that he would make his absence bearable for her by communicating with her every day. She began receiving German gifts, including a German singing group, and had flashbacks of their last few times together and his promises. T returned and bumbled around M which made her suspicious. She went to Ws office and found Laurie June, his assistant, closing out his office. She saw that Laurie had been sending M the presents, as if they had been sent by W himself, and tricked her into admitting that W was in the Tripler morgue.

Mattie began wearing her mothers old locket and told Harm (H) that her dad had not done any prison time after he had "killed her mother" by being drunk. That didn't make sense to H who investigated the police report and found that her father had not been drunk. H talked to Mattie's father, Tom, at his rehab facility, and heard him blame himself for being in "denial," and for not paying attention, which made him skid on the ice. He had the letters, that his wife had sent to him, and gave them to H for Mattie to read. Mattie refused point blank, but then didn't come home from school and missed her first Al-a-Teen meeting. She walked in, just as Coates and H were calling the police, then stormed into her room refusing to talk. Later she told H that she had read the letters and was reconciling with her father.

C began, according to Coates, "loosing it" by: singing "Ta Dah" after giving Harriet (Ht) a commendation from the SECNAV for her USO Christmas show; calling T by his first name; and giving Bud (B) two eagle bookends to "thin out his stuff." He discussed with B the "solid ceiling" he had on his rank, due to his handicap. Then he reserved the Annapolis officers club for his formal "dining out" party. He started the rumor, with Coates, that he was retiring, and gave her the manual for the Dining Out saying he would appoint an officer as "Mr. Vice." Ht announced that she was pregnant, with twins, and was requesting an inactive reserve billet. C appointed Ht as "Madame Vice" and had bagpipes play as he made his entrance as the "President of the Mess." Mikey (Mk) was charged with having his glass empty, and requested B as his council. B explained the infraction, and Mk was fined $5 to charity. H toasted C that his retirement would "take him to a place of peace, contentment and natural fibers." C gave a great speech about spending time with his daughter, visiting ball parks, and how he would remember everyone. As his last official act as JAG, he swore B in as Lt. Cdr., having written a six page letter to the promotions board. He was shown walking out of the club in slow-motion, looking back at everyone and remembering.

M had worsening back pain and H made a doctors appointment for her. The doctor said it was referred pain, and ordered a laparoscopy. She was shown giving M the results, but they weren't revealed out loud. She eventually talked with H and complained that men just "seem to come and go" in her life, except for him. When he said he would always be there for her, she said there was something that he had to know, and told him. He recalled for her their 5-year agreement which was up this week and told her: "the offer still holds." [So, it's anyone's guess what next season will be like - let's hope they are not going to mess with a good thing!]

Hard Time - 201

[This is such an incredibly absurd episode, and the expectation that the JAG audience is gullible enough to believe it is so condescending, that it reduces it to the level of an adolescent 'soapbox opera' or 'sitcom.' It is hard for me to believe that it even deserves retelling! I wouldn't, except that the premise, that two 'poppy seed' bagles can ever be 'mistakenly' the source of a false positive drug screen, cannot be left unchallenged. Ms. Coen not only wrote an exceedingly poor episode; but, compounded it by perpetuating a drug user myth, and completely fabricating her own medical reality. The premises are childish, the dialog fabricated and the actions are out-of-character. Where is this series going?] Mac (M) prosecuted PFC Michelle Boyer for 'Heroin use' and won a conviction yielding 1 year confinement. The 'brig-chaser' let Boyer get in M's face and ask if she'd ever 'regretted sending someone away?" Then, when M answered 'no,' Boyer cold-cocked M to the ground. T asked for another three years, and the judge gave her four! Then, when M found that the same incompetent 'brig-chaser' was being assigned to move Boyer across country, she asked the convening authority, Col Okerman, to assign someone else. You guessed it, Okerman was the overused, arrogant, condescending, resenting women in military type and refused. Then, when Chegwidden (C) tried to intervene, Okerman demanded that M be assigned to do it (!) And C agreed (!!) They couldn't find military transport (!) went commercial (!) with a layover in Cincinnati - Boyer's 'hometown.' (!) Boyer 'disappeared' in 15 seconds from a restroom stall with M standing in front of it (!), then was recaptured when she went for a smoke (!). No more flights to San Diego until the next day and a weenie security boss forced M off the airport (!) Of course, sharing the same room made them best of buddies, so M took her the next day to see her daughter in her boyfriends custody (!) where she, again unattended, stole pills from a bathroom and tried suicide. Again, missing the apparently 'only' flight from Cincinnati to San Diego (!) and giving M the opportunity to feel sorry for her and take her to a beautician, and shopping and out to eat (!) Of course she would pig out on muffins and begin to retch and be taken to an ER where an eager 'intern' would recognize 'poppy seed' induced 'false positive' drug test and offer that 'some people's system's are more sensitive' and he would run 'allergy tests' to prove it (!!!!) C goes to bat for M against little Lord Fauntleroy Okerman to obtain a new trial and M testifies that even she wouldn't have had better control if she'd been falsely convicted (!) [This is the kind of crappy writing that lost the show ratings and got it cancelled!]

Harm (H) and Bud (H) were assigned the case of Senior Chief Paul De Fina who's CO, Stotler, stupidly revealed De Fina's HIV status to PO McMichael, who had gotten a 'couple of drops' of blood on his sleeve from De Fina's cut hand without either proper rationale or precautions for confidentiality. Of course, McMichael gossiped it all over the unit. Again, the arrogant, know-it-all Stotler not only compounded the harm by relieving De Fina of duty, but basically told H "oh well" when the harm his actions had caused was pointed out. De Fina wanted to proceed with charges for reversal of the decision but his wife, who was also HIV positive, refused to talk to H and B. De Fina had been shot in a rebel uprising in Africa and received 'tainted' blood according to the hospital. B, in his meticulous follow-up, found the treating doctor who said that he remembered the case and didn't give any blood transfusion. H and B manipulated a confession from De Fina's wife who had found she was HIV positive while her husband was away then let him think that he had infected her. De Fina filed for divorce and got a position as HIV case manager at Bethesda. Stotler wanted H to get De Fina back because he was now short of trainers; but, De Fina refused.

Meredith came to visit C. Coates didn't keep her out saying "I'll pay for this, but it's in his best interest." Meredith said she didn't come to patch things up or ask forgiveness, just "couldn't let us part without words." C said: "goodbye." When she said "I deserved that," he told her that "falling on your sword" was embarrassing and he wasn't "playing out a scene from a bad movie with you." She told him that "Allesandro is married, so I am not worthy of being with any man, especially you." And "I've done this four times. Two acts of unfaithfulness and two I just disappeared." She said it was a pathology, self-destructive behavior. He told her to "go to a Therapist and stop working it out on the unsuspecting." She tried to start requesting something; but, he shut her off with "not this time" and "somewhere down the line with someone else." She left.

Close Quarters - 189

[A odd little episode where Chegwidden acts like a pompous ass, Turner an uncertain patsy and the plot is barely believable. A lot of 'parallel play' fragments the storyline making the synopsis difficult] In the sea of Japan Cdr Joyner's sub, USS Cathedral City, rescued North Korean sailors when they were spying on South Korea and their minisub sunk on a reef. Chegwidden sent Turner to "see what's up" and decide if the spies are "combatants or survivors." C also told him to "come back with a new attitude." Unfortunately an arrogant intel officer, Lt. Ye, was also dispatched to conduct intelligence interviews and interpret. Without provocation, he immediately bristled and tried to put T "in his place" during the plane ride over to the sub. Ye said something to the prisoners and they all began yelling. T tried to interview the Korean captain but he refused to leave his men. T decided to ask questions right there and Ye tried to back him down, saying, "that's not the way it's done." Carefully considering their options, T calmly replied, "it is now." Ye began embellishing the questions, provoking an angry outburst. When T calmly challenged it, Ye said that he had asked about surveillance equipment and advised they would salvage the ship when the Korean yelled that the Americans had run them aground. T told them they might not be allowed back to their country, and Six sailors were happy because they wanted to defect. They had to split the group (neither of who would talk), so the crew had to give up even more of their birthing space. Ye became more openly smart mouthed to T, so T asked "do I annoy you?" The arrogant creep, turned it back on T as having offended him! T said whatever it was, wasn't intentional - but the toe-rag snotted back: "I think it was." T attempted to know him better and found that he had grown up in Los Angeles, and his father had become reclusive after being shot in a liquor store robbery. Just then Joyner announced that the Koreans were to be picked and taken to Japan. However, before they were one Korean was found unconscious in a head. T reprimanded the crew who were bad-mouthing the man. The ships corpsman used his "cookbooks" and came up with the diagnosis of SARS (?!) The entire ship had to wear "gas masks" and scrub down the entire surfaces of the boat, along with surfacing and exchanging air. Joyner Pontificated that "every molecule on the boat was suspect" but that they couldn't wear the masks for long, or it would "give them a headache and their brain would cease to function properly" [good grief, Dana. Where did you come up with this?] Then the Korean captain refused to remove his mask, saying it still wasn't safe (even though none of the Americans were still wearing them), and T asked the chief to remove the mans mask because "there brain would be affected, and they wouldn’t be able to question him." The chief tricked the man and took it off, and Ye belittled him for wanting to "feel superior." T said he didn't see that in the chief and Ye stormed off. With the SARS diagnosis, Japan wouldn't let them land so they were being diverted to Dutch Harbor, 7 days away.

Harm returned to JAG and was given the "cold shoulder" by everyone. He got T's old office with a dead rat in the wall and a stench. He met Terrance Minnerly, a one-armed, black seaman from 1942 - 45, in a pharmacy buying blood pressure pills. H befriended him and opened the pill bottle which he said he had been out of for 4 days. Police came and arrested Minnerly because the receptionist for the HMO across the street said she had been robbed. H told Mac that he was helping Minnerly, who had tried for four days to get his HMO to correct a mistake they were making but had been given the run-around. He'd been evicted for not being able to pay his rent and was sleeping at the shelter. When he went personally to the HMO offices the receptionist became obstructionistic and refused to let him see anyone. When she threatened him with security, he stuck his finger in his coat and demanded her purse. He only took enough for his pills but she called security. M advised H that he better not take the case because he had too much work to do reviewing 27 Imes cases, two times as many as the others. Coates came and gave him 6 more "singer" cases from C. H had already let Minnerly stay in his apartment. The public defender came to JAG and dumped the case back to H because Minnerly's disability was $137 above the poverty line. Bud refused to help H, first claiming that he had too many cases to review; then, when he had to tell H he had two, he let slip that he would "If I was allowed to." He said that "no one else could either." H asked if he was being "punished," and B said "consider it a hazing." He went with hat in hand to M, but she just mocked him for poor time management, until H just started to walk out saying "I'm sorry to have wasted your time." She relented and said she would meet with Minnerly "just to see" and H brought him into the room, introducing her as his new lawyer. She told H she had changed her mind because "if you were me you would have said 'yes' and I'm overwhelmed." M talked to Minnerly and C had to interrupt her because she was late for a sentencing hearing. She just left Minnerly in her office. When H returned, Minnerly was with C.

Back on the sub, T thought Japan's refusal was "overkill" for just a corpsman's diagnosis out of a book. The corpsman he had a microscope but no "virus matching software" (huh?). T offered to be "point man" on making the slides and transmitting them to the mainland via the internet connection the ship had. The Korean captain continued to be upset and Ye accused the chief of "assaulting" the man. Another crewman was "unconscious" and the chief had thought he was just sleeping. The Korean began screaming and smashed some electronic equipment with a fire extinguisher (they were being kept in the torpedo room!!) and had to be subdues. So now, even more birthing was taken up by the Koreans and the captain asked T if he could put the four (non-defectors) into a raft and set them adrift after notifying the Koreans where they were. T said no and the Capt. retorted "who is going to protect my crew, and don't tell me God." T asked "you were under the impression that I would?" and the Capt. said "you look like a pious man." T replied "less and less." The captain said there was no more room and he would have to secure the saboteur to his rack. Ye then got in the Captains face over "inhumane" treatment. T agreed with the Capt. and said it was "strange talk from an intel officer." Ye smart-mouthed back, "keep working those cliché's." T asked "who are you representing here" and Ye claimed "his country" and that he could "do it without penalizing these men for being who they are." Finally T responded that he "resented the implication," but Ye snapped "doesn't surprise me." Trying to help the Capt. T asked "what about sedation" and Ye snapped back "great, treat him like an animal." The Capt. stood them down saying "no need to make this personal." The Capt. decided on sedation; but the lab came back that there was no SARS - it was "just a nasty flu" (right, that rendered two victims unconscious!) Ye told T "good for you, sir" and T calmly replied that it "was too bad they couldn't have gotten along better." True to his arrogant, chip on his shoulder, character, Ye responded "do you know how that could have been avoided?" T said he didn't and, instead of an intelligent conversation, Ye just smirked his adolescent snarl and said "that's too bad." T merely said "I won't argue the point" and dismissed him, after asking "was the man who robbed and shot your father black?" Ye said yes.

H called Mattie to see if Mrs. Del-Mucci was stopping by to check on her. Mattie whined that she had been given two dresses, a grammar text and a bean casserole. H responded that she was a good neighbor to have but Mattie just bellyached that she "couldn't get past the hairs on her cheek." H said that her father still being alive complicated guardianship and he would see her when "I can see over my desk." He told her that he wasn't going to abandon her. Playing the jerk, C asked H and M into his office and whined "why wasn't I informed" about Minnerly. He grandiosely pontificated about the navy's "Great Lakes Experiment" where president Roosevelt had recruited thousands of black men and placed them in supportive roles. Minnerly said that "at the time it was an honor" and many barriers were broken. He was stationed in the band at Treasure Island in San Francisco. He had played the piano - until he lost his arm in an accident two weeks after his discharge. C said that he had contacted the commonwealth attorney, who he knew in law school, and got him to agree to drop the charges for an anger management class. After Minnerly left, he chastised H for not being on "top of this… I thought better of you… aren't you the man who does what it takes to get the job done?" More calmly and respectfully than most would have been, H merely said he had the "impression that man was unwelcome in this office." C responded: "not entirely." H asked "what is expected of me? Am I to prove myself, or be myself." C looked down his nose and said "do what you do." H said it was difficult under the work load, and C smirked as he told him to give Singer's cases to M. Turner came back with the "flu" (why wasn't he unconscious too?) C told him to go home so he didn't spread it around, then informed him that Ye had filed a complaint against him through the chief of naval intelligence. He asked T if it was true and T said no. "Then that's good enough for me," C said but asked T if he "ever got angry?" T wanted to know why and C said "if you think you've been falsely accused why don't you get pissed off?" T wrung his hands and simpered he had been doing "introspection" and he "might have handled it better." C shook his head that T seemed to be buying into the accusations, then tried to introduce T to Minnerly. T declined because he was sick and said "when I'm more worthy, sir." (?!)

Shifting Sand - 184

Harm, Mac & Webb came back from So America in time to tell Tiner goodbye to Officer's Candidate School then Naval Justice School. Coates is Chegwidden's new administrative assistant. M told H that the "earth doesn't stop spinning just because you leave the room" and B said "that's not what he tells me." M & H visited W in the hospital with nerve damage and they got "lovey dovey" so H walked out. C asked Turner to start giving him progress reports because "there have been calls" regarding his "inefficient council." Then, over Ts objections, C had to shout to take Hs office and "put up pictures." B dogged T to apologize but T told him to "leave him alone" to work it out. C welcomed M back but when H asked to come back too, C said he had forwarded his resignation immediately and H had been a civilian for 72 hours. He told H that he was "fed up with his lack of dependability; not being a team player; and being ruled by emotions." M argued but H said "he's just finally accepted that I'm unchangeable, as YOU have." T told H that C took it as a personal insult that "your respect for his authority had a ceiling." Dept CIA Director Kershaw called H and offered him a job explaining that Catherine Gale was his sponsor. He declined "because your world is too fluid" and he "needed moral consistent environment." Because the legal department was full, Kershaw asked him "what else do you do?" M overheard H telling W that he was going to be a CIA pilot from outside Ws hospital room. W welcomed H "to the brotherhood" and M left.

PO Allison La Porte, daughter of Rear Admiral Richard La Porte, fell out of a medevac helicopter in Kuwait and spent 12 years w/ the Bedouins. She was captured stealing Doxycycline, an antibiotic, from a military truck. Chegwidden sent Bud as sole investigator because there were "hardly any other senior officers." B whined and C finally had to back him down. He found that she had lain in a ditch with a broken pelvis for three days until the Al Hadi tribe found and cared for her without anyone to translate. Gradually the son of the Sheik, Jamal Ben Fahad, took a liking to her and played backgammon with her. Over the year she fell in love with him, embraced the Muslim faith, took the name "Hiba" and married. When the Sheik turned over the reigns she became the wife of the sheik. During the "black years" 10 years ago when Saddam undertook a wave of oppression against the Bedou he blocked off the rivers to prevent them from getting water. Allison treated her father rudely and he told Mac to "lock her up," it turned out so that she would be forced to stay and not go back to the dessert. He described her as trying to "save the world with love," "apolitical," and "guileless" after her mother had abandoned them. B prosecuted and Mac, back from Paraguay with Webb, defended.

W told M that Allison's tribe was spying for Saddam and that her father knew it. M confronted Adm La Porte for more evidence much to his consternation. She promised him that the info wouldn’t go beyond the room but accidentally gave B the file. He then blew up at her and C called her incompetent and purposefully blowing her case. When she said that it was an accident he said instead of having followed her convictions she was sloppy and stupid. C had to back him down in order to get him to stop ranting. The witnesses were pretty strong against her but M countered them on cross examination until B called Allison's father. He revealed that they knew the tribe had followed the troops with sophisticated listening devices. B made him realize for the first time that the troops were speaking English and Allison was the only one in the tribe who could speak English. He said that he had never even considered because of her nature. Allison said that she had brokered a deal with Saddam to open a river which he did but it had been so contaminated that it was brackish and they all got sick with Leptospirosis which is why she needed the antibiotics she was stealing. She was bound over for court-martial on both desertion and aiding the enemy charges and the admiral told her he would "find her husband and tell him that he was looking out for you."

Pas de Deux - Part 2 - 181

When Garcia got the drop on them both and asked why he shouldn't shoot him W said that he could "make him rich" explaining that he had a "line" on Predator B missiles, van and 4 hellfire war heads. Garcia gave him back his gun and said that he and Mac, his wife, had "earned his trust." Garcia sent Gunny with Sadik's men to test the circuit boards then to bring back the drugs. He asked who would be backup and was told there would be none. Sadik's men kept using vague references to him like "he would be dealt with." W stopped the car to let M "relieve herself" and shot Alvaro Camacho, his driver, who he realized was a "mole" when there passed a look of recognition with Sadik's men. Edward Hardy, the CIA section chief in Paraguay, told W that he was no longer the youngest under secretary or rising star. He would give W help only if he could take credit for it- "your ticket out of her is going to have my name on it too." He was then shown going to a night meeting with some "drug lord looking" Spanish men. When it same time to take out Garcia's hacienda Hardy whined and waffled until M backed him down with full blame for letting a known enemy of the US escape. G was still waiting at Sadik's and saw them start to move the missiles so he used his cell phone to call W. Search lights came on and Sadik came on the line to tell W that "what he was looking for wasn't there." He told G that it would be a "long night for him" then took him to the veranda and had drinks with him. Finally he took him to the torture room where they were getting ready to use shocks when H & W showed up. Hardy had refused to help because "he didn't have intel." During the gunfight many of Sadik's men were killed and gunny escaped from the room but was shot as they were getting into the car. A grenade was thrown under the car and it exploded tipping the vehicle on its side.

Harm was inordinately worried about M and called Catherine Gale, CIA attorney, for some info or help finding W. She slammed him for "thinking the CIA is your own personal information kiosk." He wanted her to make a call and get him "into the loop." "There's no way in, that's why it's called the loop," she told him. She was notified of her mothers imminent demise so H drove her to the hospital. He was sucked into a role play as Gales fiancé by her lies to her mother and her brother's "arm twisting." From her death bead her mother manipulated and pressured H into getting married in her room before she died. H had B perform the ceremony who used a same sex ceremony from Denmark that he got off the internet and pronounced them "partners for life" using Harriet's ring. Then Gale's mother rallied and her condition was upgraded. She finally did put a call in to director Harrison Kershaw who said that even he couldn't get a hold of Webb because he was "on his own on this one." He told H that he'd looked at his service record and "if he ever found himself out of uniform to call him for a job."

Bud called H and said he was at home with Harriet and thanks for his criticism. Chegwidden and Meredith went around the office confirming their engagement.

Lawyers Guns and Money - Part 1 - 180

Webb returned from his 8 mo exile in Tierra De Fuego with a request of Chegwidden for use of Mac. His cover has been that he's a diamond dealer with a absent wife due to her pregnancy. Now he is supposed to make a diamond deal and must produce his "wife." M received training in recognizing diamonds and a "pregnancy suit." An al Qaeda terrorist named Sadik Fahd purchased 100 stinger missiles from a drug lord, Raul Garcia, for a large amount of coke. The stinger missiles were without circuit boards that made them fly straight which W was supplying for diamonds. W was out of his CIA territory and the area station chief told him that the operation was going to belong to both of them so he could get out of Paraguay too. W told M that he wanted her along specifically because there was a mole in the agency and he needed someone he could trust who could speak Farsi. He confessed to her that he "didn't trust himself anymore because he was taking too many chances." Garcia led them into the country and double-crossed them by bringing his and Sadik's henchmen. He tried to cheat on the deal but M discovered the cheap diamonds. Alvaro, their bodyguard, turned out to be acquainted with Sadik's men and dropped his gun; but, W noticed his actions. They also saw Gunny who was undercover inside Garcia's operation. After Garcia had the circuit boards he asked W to give him reasons "not to kill them."

Jeremy Duncan's conviction for stealing navy technology for videogames was being appealed by his civilian attorney, Harlan Bradford, claiming deficient defensy by Turner. B was speaking for the government and, again, was portrayed as bumbling and inadequate. Turner had asked H to "oversee" B so he held a "moot court" to help B prepare. Tiner acted as Bradford and came up with some obscure reasoning that H told B to expect. During the hearing B was flummoxed and basically said that he "acknowledged Ts lack of aggressive defense but that the law only entitled the defendant to 'adequate' defense." T stormed out of the room angry at B and then at H for listening to the "brain farts" of a law student. He told H that no matter what happened the panel would think he was "lazy and incompetent."

H got out of jail and was back in his office torn apart by NCIS. He tried to get close to M but she was already going w/ W. He asked her not to go and she asked him why "he only got like this when she had one foot out the door and couldn't respond?" H had bad dreams about M & W getting betrayed and killed and called Ws mother who said "Clayton is very protective of those he loves." Harriet was having pregnancy related discomforts and ended up talking to H because B wasn't listening. When B gave H excuses for botching Ts appeal, claiming to have "lost confidence," harm blew up at him and told him to "stop making excuses and start paying attention."

C tried several times to give an engagement ring to Meredith but first Tiner screwed up his arrangements causing embarrassment, then Meredith did her scatterbrained routine allowing "damit" to eat the cake the diamond was in. She finally caught on and asked him if he was trying to propose so C just gave her the ring.

Heart and Soul - 174

The government was taking legal action against a contractor of defective aircraft Heads Up Display (HUD) units. Chegwidden wanted Harm to take him up in an F14 in order to "understand" the problem which was making pilots disoriented. C loosened his belt before a maneuver, hit his head on the canopy and accidentally pulled the ejection lever blasting him out of the plane an into a snowy forest. His survival gear consisted, in part, of a rubber raft, tent, matches and a condom (no winter clothing). He set up the tent and built a fire on a flat snowy place, chipped a trough in a frozen log, built a fire, heated rocks, melted snow in the trough and caught the water in the condom- both to drink and to mark an arrow in the snow. The fire melted the ice on the lake he had made camp on dropping him and his gear in the water. Freezing he began hallucinating about being by a fire with Meredith on Valentines day and receiving the large silver heart inscribed with: "A woman would run through fire and water for such a kind heart," words from Shakespeare's Merry Wives of Windsor.

H was told that "he had done enough" by "dumping a two star in the forest" and should go back home. Instead he took the worn Hum-Vee he was offered for transportation into the forest to look for C. He found Cs original camp site but he was gone. Just as the search helicopter had picked up the signal beacon C was attacked on the arm by a wolf knocking him into the raft which slid down the mountainside. The helicopter saw the signal look like it was on a snowmobile then disappear. C fired his signal flare but it misfired and hit a log setting it on fire. It kept him warm enough until an abandoned dog found him. He followed the dog to some garbage cans. Hs Hum-Vee wouldn't start so he began following Cs trail on foot and was frustrated because C kept moving around. Finally he stumbled into a diner and asked to start a search party and offered a reward. The waitress pointed to a booth in the corner where C was sitting huddled in blankets drinking coffee. He was taken to the hospital where he met Meredith and told her that he loved her. Startled she thought he was under stress so he told her of the heart and said "I've had to run through fire and water to get to the feelings I have, are you backing out?" He also introduced her to the "other lady" - the dog which he had decided to adopt.

M was judge on a case where Turner was prosecuting PO Matthew Cantrell for putting a small video camera in the female head ostensibly to look for mice. Bud's only defense was that he was doing it in the line of duty and as a favor to the women to "prevent the mice from making electrical sparks and fire while the women were using the facility." M didn't buy it for a minute and told B & H to work it out before she had to rule on it asking B to "look at my face" and see if he would like the verdict. B & T negotiated him out of the service. M tried to keep Cs disappearance a secret but Coates, who she had sworn to secrecy in order to watch the phones, told Tiner then Harriet then B then T. Finally the whole crew knew more of the details than M.

All Ye Faithful - 169

[This was one of the most superbly written episodes, a parody, of the entire JAG saga] The story all happened on the way to a Christmas eve party at the Roberts home. Turner assisted "Mary and Joseph" Tenny, who were evicted from their apartment in a misunderstanding over "drumming." Mary was imminently pregnant and Chegwidden loaned his office to them for comfort while they attempted to resolve the situation. Mary went into labor and C delivered her baby, Jason, in the office secondary to an ambulance failure.

There were three Kuwaiti lawyers on their way to JAG headquarters in a rented car for a site visit that the SECNAV had authorized. Through the show they became lost and finally called C who "talked them in" on phone. He told them "look for the radio tower beacon light" through the fog and they finally arrived, after Mary's baby was born, in full "wise men dress" and being overjoyed, gave gifts: a silver coin, incense and an apartment with a view, from one of their 16 apartment buildings.

Coates came to JAG and Tiner began "sparking" her. He had never been around an infant and brought a stuffed sheep and a swaddling blanket to the baby Jason who was sitting in the firelight in his mothers arms with his father and the Kuwaiti "wise men" standing by. H notified b that he might be late to the party as they were flying a Tomcat home. Co asked Mac "if there was a problem" and she said "only if there is no aspirin." M opened her gift from H which was a photograph of them in Afghanistan- and M said that her present to H was a picture frame of the identical size. Meredith told C that he encouraged pregnancy and labor. She cited: Harriet, Singer, and the lady today- "you're a facilitator" she said.

Bud & Harriet had not been paid in a month and were hurting financially, especially since they needed to buy food for their party that night. They went to see "Scoggins," a scrooge like disbursing officer, who was rude and unhelpful to them. Harriet cursed him with "I hope the ghost of Jacob Marley drags chains on your foot," as she was ill from what they supposed to be food poisoning from five day old Chinese food. B drove her to the ER where a pediatrician took sympathy on them and came, in a Santa costume, to their aid. He informed them that it wasn't food poisoning after all, rather pregnancy. After B & H left his office, the scrooge Scoggins" experienced eerie happenings at work and showed up at the Roberts house, just before guests were to arrive, with food, saving them from needing Big Bs credit card at a restaurant.

H and Boone were on a carrier heading back home, hopefully in time to make the Robert's party. Their ride home broke a tail hook and couldn't land. H found that there was a Tomcat which was supposed to be delivered to the states that evening but he had to bribe the pilots with an introduction to Jennifer Lopez in order to get them to switch with he and Boone. H confessed to Boone that he saw Jennifer Lopez two times a year for many years as his dental hygienist. But the ships CAG was hateful to H saying that the plane H had dumped into the ocean "was my ride" and was "ok when I flew it." Boone told harm "he doesn't like you." At the last minute an unexpected inspection kept all the ships pilots onboard so the CAG allowed them to fly the Tomcat to the states. When H tried to "make nice" with the CAG he told him "I won't allow you to undermine a perfectly valid level of resentment with me" and said he would "yank Hs wings" if he did "anything except go to the assigned destination." They were flying in a storm and were requested to divert in order to assist a "broken" C130 to land in the fog. They couldn't see the C130 through the fog so H wanted to get closer despite the regs. "How many people do you plan to piss off today," Boone asked him. "Everyone but you," H replied. H descended and hit a weather balloon throwing them nearly out of control. They finally met the C130, which they found to be on toys-for-tots run. They "led" the big plane down letting them follow their "red tail lights" to "Rudolph the red nosed reindeer music."

After landing H went to the Vietnam wall with Boone, who had flashbacks of Rabb Sr going down on Xmas eve. M called, worried, and they told her they would be there shortly. They met Lt. "Clarence," a graduate of flight school who had left in an emergency before his "winging" ceremonies in order to help a friend on suicide watch. Winging was normally done by an admiral so H had Admiral Boone do it using Hs wings. Boone asked Clarence was his goals were and was told "to be a Blue Angel" just as a bell rang on a wreath.

FINALLY, all were gathered at the Roberts. Meredith offered to play the piano for them to sing carols and C desperately tried to dissuade her. Everyone was completely surprised that it was a skill which she actually did have. At dinner, Bs toast (holding up his designer crutch) was: "God bless us, every one."

The Promised Land - 160

B came home in a wheelchair as was met at the airport by C, T, M, H, Mk, Ht, aj (No BB). C came to the hospital and tried to give him a purple heart but he wouldn't receive it. B refused rehab while Harriet was there ostensibly because he didn't want her to see his stump. Harriet wasn't talking to B about his injury ostensibly because she "was being supportive." After C confronted Ht she and B began talking about him loosing his leg. Finally she demanded to pin the Purple Heart on him and he demanded to stand up to receive it. BB made excuses and refused to visit B. B finally called him and said "I love you" to which BB didn't respond.

Chegwidden began dating Meredith Cavanaugh who, besides being a Shakespearian scholar and college professor played a complete fool. She brought him food "thinking she could cook" but it tasted foul; she made a fool of herself by taking over the piano players microphone in a fancy restaurant (NO karaoke bar) and wailed apparently oblivious to the winces of the patrons. She did give C insight about how to handle his sensed resentment from Harriet. C described her to H as "the brightest most perceptive woman he's met. There's nothing that doesn't interest her and nothing that she's afraid of trying. Her capacity for expanding herself is becoming an issue. She is remarkably unskilled but doesn't know it. She has no sense of her own limitations - and she wants H to teach her to fly!" C asked Ht point blank "Do you resent me?" Harriet didn't answer. When he asked "do you hold me responsible?" she said "Yes." Then she said that "if Bud had to choose between his leg and having you in his life HE would choose Cs leadership."

H & M together defended an deserter cpl Peter Mars who was found fighting in the Israeli army after: becoming Jewish; being rejected by his mother & his Jewish fiancé; and being relieved as fire team leader after breaking cpl Fogal's nose when Fogal threatened w/ him with circumcision. The (I'm better at obeying orders than you) T prosecuted along with S as co-council. S "shut H up" by claiming to be Jewish herself and never feeling "put upon" in the service enough to desert." When T questioned her about her "hiding" her religion she lied even deeper. Mars was found guilty but received a light sentence. During the case T asked the jury: "what is ultimately the moment of truth? It is the intersection of what you want for yourself and what is expected of you."

C told S of her new assignment to the Seahawk to replace Bud. T told S that "it saved him from requesting to never be partnered with her again" & he's "considering revealing her lie" (he had checked her service record and revealed her lies). S asked what she could do. "Anyone else but you I'd tell to pray."

In Country - 157

[A follow-up to the previous stories where nuclear material was stolen from Russia, a Russian submarine captain was recruited by Kabir, and Kabir's brother committed suicide after being tried for terrorism by Harm and Mac - with Chegwidden defending.] Gunny is in Afghanistan working black ops with Clayton Webb trying to find Kabir and accidentally called in a strike against a civilian vehicle. The family was to have been warned to stay home by Gunny's eight month native friend, Fareeza, who was documenting Afghan genealogy, so they didn't suspect anyone but Kabir would be on the road. The SecNav sent Harm and Mac back to Afghanistan to "keep a watch for the navy's interests." They elicited Gunny's help to keep tabs on Webb. A local warlord and informant, Zumai Fureeq, tried to get Webb to take out his competition by giving false location of Kabir; but, Webb realized it and didn't follow through with the payment. H & M found that the village had not been warned by Fareeza, then found a young boy who recognized her picture as being with a "man with one brown and one blue eye," Kabir. Going back to camp M swerved to miss a goat and hit a land mine with their HumVee's tires throwing H out of the vehicle into a mine field. On the way back he stepped on a mine which would detonate when he lifted his foot. M slid an ammo box over it so H could stand on it then jump to safety. They needed to hike back to camp and ended up "sharing body heat" sleeping under the stars on a bluff overlooking a small group of huts - which would be hit later that night by a strike called in by Webb. Back at JAG headquarters Singer appeared to Harriet to be gloating over H & M being missing so called her a "coward" and suggested they "remove their bars." Harriet took her into closed office and decked her. Later Singer told Chegwidden that she had walked into door and that she would "respond, but not in a way that the admiral needed to be concerned about."

Bud and Coates, on board the carrier, sparred with Dale Woodley, a CIA agent who was using inappropriate tactics in interrogation. Woodley stormed out telling B that "this one is all yours." B was able to get the location of Kabir's camp from the US trained, captive terrorist by talking star trek. Webb called in the massive strike and wouldn't listen to Gunny who tried to get him to change it into a rescue mission (of Fareeza)… so gunny decked him to get his attention. Finally Webb listened but couldn't get the strike changed. Webb told Gunny of a woman he knew in South America before an uprising, intending to commiserate with Gunny but claimed what happened to her was "classified." Bud was shown advising the captain and legally "approving" the strike which nearly took out H & M, who were sleeping on the bluff. The next day H & M were found walking down the road and taken to the village where W and G were helping sift through the body's and Commander Teresa Coulter was helping with forensics. They pulled Fareeza from the rubble and before she died she said that she had run into Kabir at the first house she went to warn but he had convinced the family that she was actually a CIA agent and they needed to flee in the same direction he was going. Of course they were the ones who were killed by Gunny's attack and Kabir escaped. Webb quoted the words: Nuestro amor de es el nino del padre (our love is the child of a cruel father), to the grieving Gunny. A few of the dead also had "radiation poisoning" and one of the huts was still "hot." They found a severed finger with a ring inscribed to Kabir and initially thought he was dead; but, Coulter discovered that it had been cut off and not blown off. At the end Kabir was shown waving goodbye to a truck with a bandaged hand.

Hero Worship - 152

[a well crafted episode] The SECNAV ordered Chegwidden to send Harm and Mac to investigate the captain of the old destroyer, USS John Cooper, for a "lack of leadership" under the guise of investigating a galley fire. Seaman Tim Holley of sick bay, a 4th generation "squid," was trying to live up to his fathers accomplishments and saved seaman Todd Raff's life from a fire. Raff admitted to smoking in the galley. M reccommended an article 32 but the captain wanted to handle it merely with a captain's mast. Adm Albrecht, of SURFLANT, wanted "to send message to the captain" so took authority himself and ordered the article 32 hearing. H eventually showed that a sparking electrical short could have caused the fire. M, the prosecutor, said that "Albrecht wanted Raff out to teach the captain a lesson." H then found an Oxygen tank leak from sickbay had acted as an accelerant causing flash over. Raff wouldn't let H use it however, out of loyalty to Holley's career. So he was sent to court-martial. H told M that it was out of the "price of Loyalty."

C consulted with Carl Messing, a White House aide, in producing a white house dinner honoring all the surviving medal of honor recipients. One hero, Cpl. Henry Guernsey was excluded by the white house Chief of Staff because he had a pending court date for shoplifting. C went to meet Guernsey and found that he was over 80, confused and barely coping since his wife had died. Guernsey had held off 400 Japanese with 2 boxes of hand grenades, saving his platoon. Meredith forced C into a picnic on a lawn and made terrible tasting food, but gave C insight into helping Guernsey himself. C connected Guernsey with an organization to obtain a roommate, got him a uniform and arranged an alternative party specifically for him with his old 2nd platoon. C told Messing that "undervaluing their contribution because he's imperfect makes us look petty and thoughtless." The only persons so described were the president's COS and Adm Albrecht who both "got their own ways" but never found out just how petty they were. B was exonerated from his dereliction charges but C told him it was "not your finest hour." B & Harriet were trying to decide upon a next duty station to use his "second chance" to further his career.

Head to Toe - 149

H & M in Saudi Arabia defending a "Condor" pilot, Lt Stephanie Donato, for disobeying DOD & her base commander's orders; namely: not wearing an abeya with a veil and driving herself (i.e. in front seat) in an automobile with a male escort. She was told that the Abeya and veil rule "would be reconsidered" when she was assigned to fly food drops. It wasn't, so she complained to her CO and eventually wrote 8 letters and openly petitioned the Secretary of Defense. A security guard caught her in the restaurant and ordered her into an abeya and into the back seat of his vehicle. She disobeyed hence the court-martial. Throughout the episode H & M several times worked out compromises with prosecutor Lt Col Sara Coffey; however, her temper & tongue dug her in deeper. She apologized to a Muslim cleric who was "offended" by seeing her in the restaurant. When he started to pontificate about American women "not thinking" she told him that "a man who doesn't treat females any better than camels in his garage doesn't deserve to be in their company."

Really trying to avoid publicity Coffey kept offering to "deal." She asked H & M to meet her in town where she was participating in a meeting. M had to wear an abeya and veil and was shown being knocked into by Saudi men who treated her as if she wasn't there. She finally tore it off and said that they "wouldn't deal." Harm finally got her to explain that "it diminishes a woman's ability to be taken seriously." Additionally Donato was determined to publicize the issue but they were loosing. While flying a mission Donato had to emergency land in the desert due to engine failure. When, instead of trying to help, a local policeman tried to embarrass her and force an abeya on her she elbowed him in the gut. Then the men in her unit joined her crusade stating that "The Saudi's instead of offering help tried to humiliate her" and that the regs were "inconsistent w/ rules of good order & discipline & erode unit cohesion." No one needs to salute a female officer in an abeya if they don't know what rank she was. The final finding was that she did disobey orders but with extenuating circumstances so no court-martial. Gen Sawyer said unless she disbanded crusade he would ground her. Coffey answered the press for Donato: "DOD must realize that short term solutions cause long term problems"; and that we "look forward to the day when not one member of armed forces will be forced to suffer disrespect as a price for victory."

Leatham told H that she wanted to be kept "in loop" on the women's issue. C counseled T to "have some fun." So T took Leatham on a date to an Afghan restaurant where she didn't like either the food or sitting on the floor. She then suggested that they go to a Salsa club which he didn't like. B & Ht arrived late at the restaurant w/o reservations due to babysitter problems & joined their "not talking to each other" first date. T apologized to B & Ht for putting them in the middle and Ht counseled him to "try again." He did, and convinced Leatham to meet him at a "neutral place" to try again and took her to baby-sit little AJ to give B & Ht another chance at a date.

Code of Conduct - 147

H defended a SEAL Lt Glenn Teague for retrieving the body of PO Tommy Modano despite orders; thereby allowing Lt. Jody Reese to be killed which angered his pregnant wife Mariel. Teague refused to talk to Mariel or take the stand (falling on his sword to keep a secret) until H manipulated them to be in the same room together. Teague had carried the wounded Modano during the first mission. When the helicopter came he gave him to Reese during the extraction. Before Reese had died he told Teague that he had accidentally let Modano fall 55 feet from the tether. Reese confessed he felt guilty. When they wanted to go back to retrieve Modano the "powers that be" said no. That's when they went anyway because of the SEAL code.

B found that GPS coordinates showed the fall didn't kill Modano and he had tried to move to safety so the rescue could have succeeded if it hadn't been delayed. Teague finally took the stand where he said that instead of being mutilated & left to rot like rebels do to their dead, Modano was in Arlington "occupying a space of his own in the land be died defending." Teague was found not guilty on dereliction but guilty on disobedience.

C was at a high school to give a speech when he tried to correct the insolent behavior of a cocky student James Oliphant which was caught on videotape. Defiantly Oliphant spit on C who reflexly slapped the boy. Because it fit into the SECNAV and Lindsey's vendeta against C (blaming C for Lindsey's failure through promotion board) he DEMANDED Cs resignation & threatened w/ a flag mast. C refused and Adm Drake held the mast w/ Lindsey "advising" and authorized to speak for both SECNAV & CNO. M forced her representation on C because he was "running on emotion & will loose." Oliphant lied on every aspect and said that his dad had died in Desert Storm. M didn't even cross examine. Lindsey agreed w/ M to drop the mast & the pressure to retire in return for a public apology to the boy. C said he had been "prepared to do that the first day - except the boy lied." ZNNs Stewart Dunston arrogantly dogged C. T forced his help on C preparing a press statement "to take control of the situation." C talked to Adm Thomas Boone, now working in SECNAVs office, about the mast that he had gone through. Boone said he wouldn't have slapped the kid he "would have slugged him." Angry Dunston started digging deeper into sources and found that Oliphants father was dishonorably discharged, abandoned his wife & was living in Florida. Dunston told C that he would be "leading with it the next day." The CNO back-peddled and dropped the mast. Boone met C afterwards in bar. The SECNAV came in & set w/ them. Both C and the SECNAV ordered Burbon but the aired episode ended w/o them saying anything to each other. [although the close caption said: "one bourbon 2 straws"]

Jagathon - 141

[Superbly written, complicated expose' of the JAG "relationships" using flashbacks between the actual race, and the days leading up to it, throughout the whole episode] Turner (T) wouldn't enter the Jag-a-thon which Harriet (Ht) produced, because he was a champion runner and felt the "highest rank" reward should go to "someone here longer." He finally asked Chegwidden's (C) counsel saying that he didn't think that he was "fitting in" at JAG. C told him that it was because he "didn't know what everyone else already knew; namely, that he was already part of the family." Singer (S) took bets on the race which upset Ht. She told S to "stop kicking everyone on your way to top, and we all would have fewer bruises and you would be less alone." Finally, running all alone in the race, S cried.

The SECNAV pressured C into giving a JAG tour to another of his female relatives. It was set for Tuesday but the relative fouled up and came when the office was closed for the Jag-a-thon. With Harriet's incompetence in holding Cs phone, the SECNAV was able to get through and pull C out of the middle of the race only to find that the lady had already left. Mac (M) prosecuted PO Ramsey Dill when he was caught impersonating an officer while rendering first aid to a motorcycle accident. Dill had been turned down for OCS after his CO referred him to a psychiatrist for "fabricating lies" about his prior accomplishments- but they were actually true. The incompetent psychiatrist labeled him with an "identity dysfunction" as it fit in with a research paper he was writing for a medical journal- of course, pointed out by Harm (H) in his defense. H gave an eloquent closing and Dill was found guilty but sentenced to "no punishment."

Gunny (G) and Tiner (Ti) bet on each other to NOT finish the race then ran side-by-side each other nearly the whole race. Ti was distracted by a girl and headered with an oncoming jogger bruising his rib. G looked back at Ti taking his header and tripped in a hole himself, landing on his face and pulling a muscle. Neither of them finished. Bud (B), who had been shamed and pressured by Ht to enter, was actually catching up to S until she spitefully told him that "everyone was betting he wouldn't finish" which demoralized him.

T was feeling sucked into the feud (or rivalry) between H and M then finally asked H point blank if he was involved with M. Outside of an elevator, H flippantly said "anyone who has been involved with M is either dead or feels like they are" just as the door opened and it was overheard by M. C noticed M's sullenness and finally spoke with H who admitted that he had been "pushing her buttons" all day, not taking her running ability very "seriously." C asked "do you think you can stop that?" and H said he "was trying." H had told M that "even if she had a 6 min head start she couldn't win" and before he could say another word she said "I'll take it" and walked away. C told H that he didn't know why H didn't take her running seriously because M and he had been "training ever since she had gotten back from the carrier."

H apologized to M who perfunctorily accepted. H told her that he just "didn't want to compete with you anymore." T let slip to M that H had split with Renee which surprised her. They finally started the race and despite everyone's head start, H nearly caught up with M. He sent word ahead to M with Ht, riding around in a golf cart, that he was going to beat her. But meddling Harriet had him stopped "to be checked by a corpsman" cause "people were worried about him." The corpsman turned out to be PO Dill impersonating again! So H had him arrested. H and M finish in a tie and began talking: "where does this leave us?" H said: "at the end I guess." But M said: "how about at the beginning." T had won the race by 4 minutes and exercising his 24-hr "highest rank" prize, he ordered them to go back with him and run along side the demoralized B so that he could at least finish the race.

The Measure of Men - 137

Mac (M)and Gunny (G)are still on the Guadalcanal in her self imposed exile. Capt Huddleston disliked marine Major Lasley, who he considered "an arrogant SOB who is incapable of admitting that he is wrong," and ordered M to investigate when a man was killed during a severe-storm training exercise that Lasley refused to cancel. M suggested an article 32 hearing but Huddleston demanded an unusual special court-martial so he wouldn't have to give up control and therefore might be able to force Lasley off his ship. Neither M nor G liked Lasley's pattern of avoiding responsibility. Harm (H) requested the defense because M had ignored his many calls and the assignment would put him back on the same ship. Even though H kept pressing, M kept pushing him away, then said: "Brumby gave up country and navy for me, are you willing to give up Renee?" H danced around stupidly trying to make her commit to a position first, so M, frustrated, said she "was tired of the dance." H finally said "yea, I would giver her up" but by that time M had already stormed out and didn't hear him say it. Without telling H, Lasley hired Larry Kaliski (a civilian attorney who "beat" M previously) to perform his defense. Kaliski wanted H to continue second chair to which H only reluctantly consented. Kaliski threatened H with filing a grievance on him if he didn't act appropriately subservient. He nearly lost the case until H recreated the boats course showing that the accident happened due to inaccurate maps and Huddleston's own insistence on a delay which washed away the marker buoys. M finally got Lasley's XO to admit that others "may have" taken the heat for Lasley in the past. H finally negotiated a settlement with M if Lasley would take the stand and admit his portion of blame; but, he was still too arrogant and refused to do so. He was found guilty of dereliction of duty. M didn't even say goodbye to H when he flew back to JAG.

Chegwidden's (C)teen goddaughter Lisa Rossbach ran away from her aunt and came to his house. She refused to let him call her mother so they could talk. C did call her mother, Merrill, who was deployed as skipper of a ship, and offered to keep Lisa for a week over the holiday's. Lisa pretty much did whatever she wanted and acted rude, childish and demanding to C whenever she didn't get her own way. C, eventually, could only prevent her from going out in the evening to meet an unknown boy by saying that he would follow her everywhere she went. She stormed into her bedroom but then ran away from his house too during the night. Finally her mother had to take leave during deployment to solve her daughters issues.

Sturgis Turner (T)tricked Bud (B)into jogging with him 8 miles to his apartment, ostensibly "for Bs career's sake" and to ameliorate his weight problem and doughnut fetish.

Adrift (Part II) - 135

[The season opener and conclusion to last seasons cliff hanger. Apparently DJEs contract was renewed] Mac, Brumby, Chegwidden, Bud, Harriet, Chloe and Singer left the pre-wedding dinner and went back to JAG headquarters to monitor the rescue attempts. M withdrew and wanted to be alone, excluding Brum who became increasingly hurt. Renee also felt like "odd man out." She said she was going to call Hs mother but B stopped her. M postponed their wedding for that day and Brum reluctantly concurred. Chloe talked with M and chided her for not trying to find H "like you did me." Together, M had a vision of Hs raft, without H in it. She went out and put her finger on a map saying "look here." C was able to convince captain Ingle to search at Ms envisioned coordinates. The Viking found the empty raft and dropped SAR buoys. C saw Brum frustrated and told him "she's dealing with it in her own way." "That's the problem," he said. Renee asked Brum "why aren't you with M" and he told her "you'd have to ask M." Renee asked him "how do I look," and he said "left out." The SAR buoy floated and hit H. He used it as a radio to call the plane back. Then when the helicopter couldn't see him, fired his weapon so they could see his muzzle flashes. The weather was still below minimums but they pulled him up, having been in the ocean for 3 hours (the maximum exposure time). He had stage 4 hypothermia and was dying until Skates "jumped his bones" and talked him back recalling his promise to "save her."

Everyone found an excuse to be elsewhere so Renee could meet Hs plane at transfer. He had retrograde amnesia and could remember Renee but only from a year ago. H told M he was sorry for fouling up the wedding plans and asked if they had set another date. She said "don't worry about it. That's the least of our concerns." Brum pressed to reset the date for the weekend but she said she "couldn't get her head around it that fast" and to "let her think about it." Renee told B that H had forgotten their last year but "seemed to have all his Mac memories organized and cataloged." M and Brum took Chloe to the airport, hugged and were all smiley then Brum said he didn't want to reschedule. He said "let me think about it." Skates told H that the incident "had reawakened her love for flying" so she wasn't leaving. H thanked Loftness for breaking minimums and was told that "I like flying in zero-zero." When Ht wanted info on the new date, M told her that she and Brum were having problems. Renee was pressing H to talk about their relationship and he said "why does it always have to come back to M?" Brum moved out because "if we end it I don't want to have to come back here." He asked "why in a crisis am I the last one you look to?" Very upset M went to Hs apartment to talk and while there Brum called. He told her he had "wondered who she would go to first" and that he was leaving back to Australia. She left for the airport to stop him but he still got on the plane. Very upset and weeping she called H that "he's left." H told her to "come to me… you know the reason…" When she got there, however, Renee was there having just been told that her father had unexpectedly died and had asked him to go with her to the funeral. He wanted to call M when they landed but M said "don’t do that to her. I'll be here when you get back." M walked out into the storm and rain and saw H and Renee embrace through the window.